It's the end of the year again! And for geeky enthusiasts such as myself, it's the time where we recap our favorite "best of the year" list. Where in the old days (the pre-beard years), my lists used to be movies or video games, this time I talk about my newfound passion (in due part, thanks to the pandemic): Books!
One of the things I am very grateful to Allah is that I am still able to keep up a reading habit with a slight increase from 2020, having finished 27 books this year, and these are my personal favorite top 10, in no particular order. These books aren't necessarily those which are objectively "the best"; rather they are those I like the most, especially if they have a personal impact in improving my life, or challenging/shaping my perspective in . Also, they don't necessarily have to be published in 2021, only that I read them this year.
2021 Year in Review: A Reader's Journey
1. "How do you find time to read?"
That's a question I get asked quite a bit, so thought I'll share it here
Firstly: I don't "find time". I "make time". After coming back from the masjid morning (subuh /Fajr) prayers, I will spend time reading before I go for exercise. This is 100% uninterrupted me-time of morning barakah (blessings) before the family wakes up. Seize it!
Secondly: honestly, I really don't spend that much time reading as one might think. On an average day, I spend about 10-15 minutes.
BUT: The key here is consistency. I never skip a day (according to the Kindle App, my current reading streak is at 495 days in a row). If you do the math, 15 mins a day every day adds up to 90 hours per year.
For a slow reader like me, an average best seller would take a solid 3 hours to finish, therefore 15 minutes a day comes to about 30 books per year.
2. Preferred Reading method: Kindle App on Phone
Am I still using my Kindle device? Surprise! No I am not. My Kindle device died me. But I am using the Kindle app on my phone (which syncs the e-book purchases from the device), which I find a lot more practical and beneficial: the phone allows for copying texts, which is immensely helpful for note-taking and sharing as I can immediately share to social media, note-taking app, or my own personal whatsapp/telegram space. It gives a sense of satisfaction to allow me new ways to retain knowledge and share with others.
For hardcopy books, since re-typing the highlights is painful and sluggish, it kind of hampers the reading experience.
The phone app also allows 4 different colors of highlights, of which I used to my advantage to segregate the "hierarchy" of important points (i.e. red highlights indicate super important knowledge > blue > yellow), as opposed to the "black and white" monochrome of the kindle. With hardcopy books, I almost get an OCD-level frustration when I can't find my highlighter.
Also, we bring the phone everywhere anyway, right? There were many situations I was out and "wished I had brought a book" - and when we don't, we go back into default mode: whatsapp and social media. Having the Kindle app allowed for a healthy distraction
In principle, I still prefer e-books compared to physical hard copy books, due to many logisitcal reasons above. Also, being the clumsy fella I am, there was one incident in which some water spilled on my book, ruining it completely, annoying me to the point of depriving the motivation to continue reading that book (what to do... I am human).
The only downside is to reading on the phone are those pesky distractions called notifications, and the added level of challenge to fight the temptation of opening YouTube / social media.
3. Reading is "expensive"? - A worthy investment
Let's acknowledge the elephant in the room: Purchasing Books aren't cheap. The average cost of a best-selling book (which isn't on sale), is equivalent to 1 month's subscription of Netflix. And if one were to make an apple-to-apple comparison on the surface, it doesn't "make sense" to be buying e-books. With Netflix, I get full immersive video and audio experience, with big budget special effects and top notch production values. With e-books, I am paying for text (and possibly, a few pictures, flowcharts and graphs).
But, take it from me, an ex-addict of movies, video games and TV series: Books are way more satisfying. Sure, movies can provide more short term "thrills" (arguably more so than books), but they will never have the impact that books will: reading has opened up my perspective, enhance my life, teach me new things and allowed my thoughts to mature in a way that movies ever could.
So this was a massive paradigm shift: When I pay money for books, I don't pay for popcorn thrills - I invest in myself. I pay for a better me.
4. Range of topics
Continuing the trend of my reading habit in 2020, my reading list was kept practical: To satisfy my curiosity to focus reading only the content that I feel would have a beneficial impact on improving my life, in some way. There were some books I started but deliberately decided not to finish because I didn't feel it was useful or beneficial for me.
To better prepare me for my new role as manager in my workplace, I read a lot more management/leadership titles, especially those focused on 'new leaders', and I got some really good insights.
To my surprise, I did not read any fiction books, although admittedly I really wanted to.
One thing though, in hindsight, perhaps I should have read up more on Parenting - that was one genre that took a backseat in this year's reference.
5. Book Club
Inspired by the monthly book club gathering from the previous division i was working in, I have always wanted to initiate a Book Club in some way, shape or form. But to date, I still haven't quite been able to get that idea off the ground. Still figuring out how best to do it, so watch this space!
Any ideas?
Hope you find this sharing useful!
Personal Favorite - "This is Love" by Dr. Ali Albarghouthi
In his follow up to 2019's "Heart Therapy: Forty Hadiths in Tazkiyah and Soul Purification" comes the latest book by Dr. Ali Albarghouthi on Forty Hadith about Love in Islam, covering the perspectives of Love of Allah, Love for the Prophet, and Love for Creation - covering everything from family, friends, and even material objects.
I really benefitted a lot from "Heart Therapy", and so was having high expectations on this one. And I'm happy to say, "This is Love" met them - and then some. This is one of those Islamic books that, when you really put your mind to it, can really engage you on a spiritual, mental and emotional level. Admittedly, some of the content are so emotionally powerful that I teared up at some points.
And boy, this book needs to exist! Especially in the 21st century. "Love" is a topic that men rarely talk about, and sometimes the "how" aspect of applying the concept of Love feels like a mystery, especially when it comes to how do we Love Allah and Love the Prophet.
The book has a very strong central message, which is that everything is centered on the Love of Allah - whether in our actions, His actions, the creation of the universe, even the legislation of shari'ah, and even our obsession of dunya. All of those concepts - whether we realize it or not - are somehow tied to the Love of Allah. There are lots of reflections, deep insights, and actionable points, and just like Heart Therapy, what I love most are the multitude of quotations and amazing wisdoms from the righteous predecessors (salafus soleh).
On the flipside though, it is worth noting that because the book has such a strong emphasis on its central theme on Love of Allah, it may sometimes feel repetitive and a bi heavy to read a large quantity in one seating. Just like Heart Therapy, seems that this book is best read in across a period of time, reading in short bursts, implementing and reflecting in between.
One of my favorite things about Dakwah Corner's publications is how they always put in the exact reference and original Arabic texts, which is extremely useful and beneficial for Arabic noobs like me.
It’s one of those timeless references where you’d want to go back to again and again
"Dare to Lead" by Brene Brown
"I want to live in a world with braver, bolder leaders, and I want to be able to pass that kind of world on to my children."
Shame and vulnerability are topics that are rarely talked about, especially in the Asian culture. Even more so amongst much of the Malay culture amongst the men - where kindness, openness and "lack of knowledge" are often made fun of or ridiculed.
In "Dare to Lead", author Brene Brown not only tackle these issues head-on, but propose real world solutions to restore true courage in our organizations, especially among the leaders - through connection, authenticity, empathy, embracing fear of the unknown, acknowledging our faults and constantly moving forward.
What i found particularly enlightening about the book too is that it addresses a lot of the things we dislike about "corporate culture": backstabbing, lack of transparency, superficial relationships, and lack of empathy masked in "performance focus" clothing, and she does that by bringing to light an interesting perspective: the problem isn't the corporation. The problem is the PEOPLE in the corporation.
At the end of the day, whether you are the receptionist, manager, CEO, or the janitor, everyone is human. Everyone has emotions, needs, wants, strengths and weaknesses.
And therein also lies hope: because we are human beings, we can change. We have what it takes to make a change in this mess of the corporate world we are in, beginning with ourselves. It isn't going to be easy, but it is possible.
After all, as Brene Brown highlights, courage IS contagious.
"The INFINITE GAME" by Simok Sinek
I read two books by Simon Sinek this year, and was contemplating whether "Start with WHY" was better that "The Infinite Game".
Start with WHY has a stronger central theme, had powerful examples that resonated on many levels, and was delivered with strong, inspiring emotional impact.
But Infinite Game covered a larger spectrum, and brought more breadth to a topic which I found a lot more practical: how can we inculcate a culture of sustainable organizations, that think beyond "the long game"?
From ideas and concepts such as Just Cause, Building Trusting Teams, Worthy Rivals, Existential Flexilibity, and the Courage to Lead The themes here are very powerful and I could apply them directly in my day to day life, including #thebarakaheffect podcast, the process engineering team I am leading, as well as even in my family role.
As usual, Simon Sinek brings 100% of his passion into his writing, and it's evident in his words (you can just imagine him SAYING these words in a ted talk). The only gripe I have is that some of the content has a tendency to feel a bit anecdotal, and not quite as grounded in research as other books in this genre.
What I found so fascinating about this book is to read it from an Islamic perspective, especially seerah (the lifetime of the Prophet). A lot of the ideas here resonate well with what the Prophet did in his establishment of the state and his companions.
But beyond that, looking at this idea from the lens of Islamic knowledge also raises an interesting existential question that opens up a huge door to explore even further: what exactly does Simon Sinek mean by "infinite"? And what would motivate anyone want to play the infinite game? You don't just go infinite for the sake of infinite.
It seems like such an abstract concept, and Islam has the clear answer: the infinite is the Akhirah (Hereafter). It is the pursuit of the hereafter - for eternal bliss in paradise - that is the ultimate "infinite game".
And that's the big takeaway from this book, and why I feel it's *slightly* better than Start with WHY: Infinite Game opens a huge world of possibility to explore the theme even further from a Muslim perspective.
“Be The Boss Everyone Wants to Work For" - William Gentry
To prepare myself for my newly assigned, oh-so-challenging role of a manager, I read a bunch of leadership/management books this year, all of which gave a lot of great stuff. Of all of these, this book brought a lot of unique tips, especially coming from the perspective of newly promoted managers, answering a very real challenge we face:
"Congratulations, you are now a new leader. Now what?"
The book's central theme is for us to "Flip the script". Here's quoting some of my favorite reality checks from the book:
Being a boss for the first time in your life is not as glamorous as everyone thinks. At times, it’s thankless.
You sometimes feel alone and lost. Doubt starts to creep in. You start second-guessing yourself. There are times you don’t feel very bright—maybe even feel like you’re on the verge of total failure. You feel no one really “gets” you and your situation.
But I do. I’ve felt all those things. But there’s the flip side as well. As a new leader, you can make a difference in the lives of others and your organization. You help people set, meet, and even exceed their goals and expectations. You can inspire others to greatness. That sense of a “win” when your team helps others, develops the next big innovative product, or lands that whale of a client is exhilarating. I know how valuable you can be to the people you lead and serve.
To be the boss everyone wants to work for, flip it: “It’s not about me anymore.” Flip your script from “me” to “we.” Flip from a “me mentality” to putting attention on “we” and “us.”
Make others—your staff, your team, the people you lead and serve—successful and help them fulfill their potential.
(End Quote)
I found these words highly inspiring and were certainly very helpful to get me through the difficult, thankless circumstances. One of my favorite tips in the book is to be "politically savvy" - to be aware of office politics, but never to take sides or fuel the fire, and always act authentically, honestly and in good will. I found this very in line with my values and principles, and I really appreciated the honesty of the approach
Personal Favorite: “ATOMIC HABITS” by James Clear
This book is so ridiculously popular, that virtually anyone I know that has any interest in reading or self-development has either read the book or wants to read it. And the few that do, virtually all of them - even the most cynical - will testify that it's a good book.
Usually, when a book is so hyped, the skeptic in me, or the underground-inclined rebel within would just turn away from this "mainstream" stuff, determined to find a lesser-known better alternative.
But the hype is so crazy that I can't ignore it. With a ridiculously high rating on Amazon at 4.8 from 58 reviews, and consistently being on the Amazon's Non-Fiction Best Seller list for over 150 weeks.
Okay, you got my attention. (Click 'purchase').
(After reading). Fair enough.
Of all the books I've read about the subject, this is the best one, hands down. It's a no-nonsense, no-filler guide about habits, and some really spot-on ideas about themes of productivity. Author James Clear does it in a way that is relatable, easy to understand, simple to implement and to teach others, all while illustrating real-life examples.
While Charles Duhigg's "Power of Habit" brought some interesting insights and revelations from research, Atomic Habits breaks it down to practicable themes, with some unique concepts that I think are really awesome, and explain so much about human behavior:
- What does the compounding effect of "1% a day" look like
- The Plateau of Latent Potential and the Valley of Disappointment
- Forget goals! Focus on SYSTEMS
- how habits shape identity (and vice versa): identity >> process >> outcomes. Emphasizing on identity-based habits, to let your values, principles and identity drive the feedback loop rather than the results
- the practical ideas on the Laws of how to build good habits (make it obvious / attractive / easy /satisfying) and the opposite: the Laws of how to break habits (make it invisible / unattractive / difficult /unsatisfying) are so elegantly simple and practical, it almost gives you that "i know Kung Fu" confidence: you feel like you can immediately implement them and teach others.
The ideas here are so powerful that I took some of the concepts, packaged them, and shared it in a health talk in my organization this year titled "RESET Your Fitness Mindset & Habits" - and some of the tactics were also shared in The Barakah Effect podcast episode of "Breaking Bad Habits"
What is interesting here too, is that there is some room to enhance the ideas even further. Author James Clear emphasize that these habit tactics are designed "in a way that does not require heroic willpower and self-control".
But in Islam, we do have the concept of Mujahadah (striving for the sake of Allah) and Sabr - all of which "willpower" are grounded in. So now, if these tips - even without willpower - can be so effective, imagine the potential we can achieve if we put willpower in the equation!
The book is a very easy read; no complicated technical jargon, with a nice, smooth flow to it, building on previous points without ever sounding repetitive, preachy, or redundant.
Believe the hype. Go get this book.
My ‘Paradigm shift’ award – “GRIT: The Power of Passion and Perseverance” by Angela Duckworth
"Our potential is one thing. What we do with it is another"
I love any book that can constructively change or shape my paradigm of thinking, and Grit does just that. In 2020, the book "Mindset" by Carol Dweck sparked in me the concept of the growth mindset, taking into various applications in different fields. Grit seems like a natural progression of the concept, breaking it down further to more actionable steps to understand the components on how we can get onboard or stay on the trajectory of growth: Persistence and resilience.
I remember a quote from a Rocky movie years ago:
"It ain't about how hard you hit, it's about how you can get hit and keep moving forward"
I often wondered, how do we develop this? "Grit" sheds some light on that.
It starts off by challenging - and in fact deconstructing - the notion that the ingredients of success are built upon Talent, the age-old belief and bias in society. Instead, author Angela Duckworth, drawing from her research as an academician in Behavioral Science, real-world examples, as well as her own hands-on experience in her personal life on why, the number 1 ingredient of success isn't talent at all - it is effort. A sustained, stubborn perseverance and resilient to keep pushing amidst the failures, disappointments, frustrations, boredom, and mundanity along the way.
"Passion for your work is a little bit of discovery, followed up by a lot of development, and then a lifetime of deepening "
And I resonate with this personally on so many levels. Never really being the A-tier student or been a prefect, I have always grown up to believe that I was destined to be "average": not "talented" in many things compared to my peers - sports, public speaking, or even in engineering, convinced that I just "don't have what it takes".
Over the years, Alhamdulillah by the Grace of Allah, I have managed to overcome a lot of these self-limiting beliefs, but I never really understood the mechanics of "why" or "how". This book breaks it down and analyzes the components and makes it easily understandable, even shedding some light on some often-overlooked factors of why we so lazy and unmotivated, and why we lack grit in the things that we do.
The book even addresses a modern-day dilemma for parents today: how do we inculcate grit in our children, in this digital age of instant gratification? How can we train them to have resilience, without throwing them into the deep end or raising them on a farm or desert?
The author also has a very endearing, curiosity-centric writing style, as if she were a fellow student taking you across a journey of discovery everytime she encounters something odd, questioning past assumptions, including her own. It keeps the writing feel humanly grounded, humble and relatable, without getting into the geeky technicalities of her complex research.
There are portions where it feels a bit heavy and draggy in the middle, but for the most part, the book is full of wonderful insights and actionable ideas.
”WRITE YOUR BOOK ON THE SIDE” by Hassan Osman
Sadly, in spite of the many great things about 2021, it also marks yet another year where I have not yet fulfilled my ambition of writing a book.
This book is exactly what the title says it is: how to write a non-fiction book while you're working a full-time job. Which is exactly what I want.
It's one thing to inspire people to write a book, but it's another thing entirely to make them believe that they can write one. This book does the latter. It gave me a lot of hope that I can fulfill that ambition, if I really put my mind into it - and that is sufficient reason to be putting it on this list.
By breaking down practical steps on how to write a book - the author makes it seem so easy and do-able; not in a "make you feel bad for not writing a book" kind of way, but instead, he does it in a way that feels empowering and motivating, in a "just do it and don't overthink it" kind of way.
The author's context itself is inspiring: Hassan Osman is a full-time employee himself, working at CISCO and a fellow certified PMP like myself, plus on top of that, he is a family man with kids. And he talks about it, too: how he "finds time" to write amidst his busy-ness.
One thing I love is the book's length. At a concise 80 pages, you can easily read it in a couple of days (in fact, that's one of the advice that he also gives, keeping it short and sweet) - and all the chapters are straight to the point, no-nonsense hard practical tips that you can implement immediately, including how to title your book, how to easily publish them.
Don’t-judge-a-book-by-its-cover Award: “Overcoming your Childhood” – The School of Life
Don't be turned off by the awkward-looking, out-of-place title, completely i-dont-understand-what-this-is-trying-to-say cover picture, with no clear "author" in sight: This book was a mindblowing revelation to me.
This book talks about how our childhood has a major impact to who we are, especially by the people who raised us and spent time with us.
And as the book itself addresses, it's a hard topic to talk about; we seldom "question" our own parents' parenting approach. We find it taboo to objectively "judge" how they raised their children, because they are the very people we should love and respect. Therefore "finding faults" in the way they raised us simply feels criminal. Also, we will find it difficult to accept that we are "broken" or "defective". We want to believe we are normal,
While reflecting on my past and upbringing, reading this book made me understand myself better. It allowed me to selectively forgive and heal the uncomfortable aspects of my childhood, and most importantly, to be mindful of my own actions as a father, and how it can impact my child's upbringing.
Most of all, it paints a mature, holistic picture of what it is to be human: many positive qualities with lots of flaws. It applies to us, as it does to everyone else: including our parents.
The goal never was to be perfect; but to understand, forgive, try to rectify, or in some cases, even embrace those imperfections that make us human. Our childhood isn't a liability; it's simply a piece of our human character.
The book is surprisingly very concise too, at only 95 pages in length, you dive head on into the subject without fillers.
One thing though, I do feel that the book's occassionally complex language can be simplified further; the wordings do sometimes feel a bit difficult to grasp, and, being compiled by a pool of writers (School of Life) instead of a single authors, there are times where the impersonal, passive nature of the writing style feels a bit disconnected.
Do check it out! I am sure everyone will make their own surprising discovery upon reading this book, and perhaps help you to heal and mature as a person.
Biggest Unexpected Surprise: “TALK TO ALLAH – Finding Comfort by Making Du’a to Him” by Ayesha Syahira
Looking at the book's cover, one might think that this book looks very girly.
And after reading it, I can say that yes, it is very girly.
But it is also very, very good.
The one book that totally caught me by surprise in the best ways, in Talk to Allah, author Ayesha Syahira breaks down the concept of Du'aa (supplications to Allah) in such a simple, relatable, practical way, that convinces you that it is so easy to make du'aa, by TTA (talking to Allah)!
If there was one major thing the book excelled in, it made me feel that I should make more du'aa. In fact, the author was so convincingly passionate about it, that it made me feel the FOMO (fear of missing out) and made me feel guilty and kind of left out why am I not doing more TTA!
Interestingly, what makes the book so uniquely appealing and likeable - even to me - is its seemingly "girlish" style, which makes it so endearing. She writes with such a raw honesty about her relationship with Allah from a du'aa perspective, including her private thoughts, that it almost makes me feel guilty as if I'm reading someone's personal journal about the love of her life, or I am sleazily eavesdropping a conversation between lovebirds, like how parents used to switch on the speakerphone on the other side of the line.
But strangely enough, therein lies the beauty of it - the One she loves is the One Whom we ALL should be Loving: Allah!
And so with her honest writing, this book goes one step further and does something unthinkable: it made me - in a good way - feel jealous that she loves Allah so much!
I admit, that is such a strange feeling and oh-so-awkward to admit. But at the same time, it's inspiring because her writings inspire the reader feel hope that we too can achieve that.
She blends in the subjects of du'aa, tauhid, tawakkul, qadr in a way that is very easily practically understood for the average Muslim, in a way that I wish were taught to Muslim youth today, especially in schools, and especially so in a cultural tradition where we seemed to have overcomplicated this very noble act of worship in conversing with our Creator and Lord.
Beyond that, the author also takes extra care to verify the authenticity of her content, in fact at multiple times passionately inviting readers to seek authentic knowledge.
There are parts that might seem repetitive at times, and though the content authenticity is excellent and well-grounded in Quran and Sunnah (to the best of my knowledge), some daleel (evidences) and references are skipped, perhaps in favor of simplification and keeping the narrative easier to follow, though I also can appreciate the conversational-style tone that lends it a very strong sense of accesssibility to the average layman Muslim, instead of a technical academic discourse about du'aa.
This book made it to MPH's #1 best-seller list, and it's easy to see why.
When I first started reading this book, I was expecting to say, "I can see why young girls would like this book."
But to my delight, I can confidently say, "I really like it too!".
Check it out !
“TINY HABITS” by BJ FOGG
I read three books about habits this year - what can I say, I love the subject - and just when I thought I learnt everything there was to know about it, this book pops out of nowhere and just knocks you off your feet.
I heard about BJ Fogg in a podcast interview,
Being a behavioral scientist from Stanford, author BJ Fogg brings some really mindblowing insights and very practical ideas, drawing from real life experiences using very relatable and grounded examples.
One of the best aspects of the book are the Fogg behavioral model (B = MAP), explaining the basics of motivation vs. ability, and how it factors in towards building or breaking habits. With this model, we can even go back to books like "Atomic Habits" or "Power of Habit" to reconcile where the tactics fit in this spectrum.
The author emphasizes a lot about the role of emotions – something Atomic Habits alluded to briefly, but here in Tiny Habits, it’s drilled in with so much emphasis, that I can see now why some school kids feel so inspired or demotivated just because of a teacher’s etiquettes, and why some children grow up emotionally mature with healthy self-esteem, purely because of their parents’ approach. Pretty big insights and revolutionary discoveries to me.
My only gripe about the book is that it tends to feel a bit repetitive. BJ Fogg writes in a style similar to a professional self-development course, building on previous chapters, re-emphasizing key points to ensure he drives the point home. But because he includes so many exercises, it makes it easy for the reader to even re-teach the subject or try it out, especially for coaches or mentors – in fact he makes it clear that he WANTS us to teach these concepts.
This lends a feeling of authenticity to the content, on how passionate he is about it and how much he believes in it.
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