The difficult task of Conveying performance ratings

 

When I first took on the role as a manager, my predecessor once advised,

"evaluating performance ratings is the most difficult part of the job"

He's right. 

Of the entire cycle - from evaluation, to deliberation, to justifying proposals - the final step is perhaps the most difficult of them all: conveying their performance ratings. 

I recall a time earlier on in my career, when I asked my manager directly about my ratings. At the time, I was still struggling with my job, constantly facing a stream of mediocre ratings without really knowing or understanding why. When the final performance ratings were out, I went to him and asked, 

"I would like to know my performance rating. And I also want to seek your feedback and advise, how can I improve?"

His legendary response:

"Just wait for the letter."

Frustrated and unhappy at the answer, I insisted, "okay, well can you at least tell me your feedback? I want to know how I can achieve good performance."

"Just wait for the letter."

Then the letter came, and surprise, surprise: another mediocre performance rating. Which, I got to know later, I was among the bottom-ranked people in the team. The letter didn't state any feedback, description or explanation: Just one measly number to cause long term traumatic disappointment and demotivation. 

As expected, my manager never bothered to even speak to me about it. I have no idea what went wrong, why I received this. Why didn't he have the decency to just talk to me or have a conversation? Why treat me like some nuisance that you're obviously trying to avoid? 

This heartbreaking, traumatic incident taught me one important lesson: How NOT to convey this news to your staff. I told myself that if I were to manage people one day, I would never do it like this like a chicken, hiding behind letters to avoid difficult conversations. 

It serves as a reminder to myself and my fellow leaders out there: We need to add the human touch AND treat people like human beings. Be transparent. Own up to your decisions. Bite the bullet.

Of course, it's easier said than done.  

Now I'm in that position of shouldering this responsibility, I can understand and empathize why people avoid it altogether. We tend to avoid difficult conversations. 

It's never easy to convey the news, particularly when people don't quite get the ratings they believe they deserve and fall short of their expectations. Frustration, anger, disappoitment... sometimes you will get attacked and blamed at for their plight.

Instead of avoiding it or whining about a system we can't control, the most mature & professional thing to do is to accept this painful reality for what it is, and to execute our duties to the best that we can within our control: with ihsan and sincerity. 

Here's what I learnt about how we can beat deal with this:

1. Have the Courage to confront difficult conversations 

One of the crucial leadership skills we must develop is the courage to face and endure difficult conversations. Yes, they will express themselves. Yes, it is unpleasant. 

But that's the job. That's why they pay you for the role. Own up to the responsibility and do it well: have the humanity to hold a decent conversation. 

If you avoid these conversations, you will only build in resentment, bitterness, frustration, demoralization, and potentially trigger a cycle of seeking revenge.

2. Keep it straight: Be honest and transparent 

If the staff underperformed, or failed to meet expectations, or what they can learn from others, just be frank about it and say it out. 

Don't come up with lame excuses or vague blanket scapegoats to blame the boogeyman, e.g. "management" gave you this rating. 

3. Be kind

Unpleasant conversations don't have to be confrontational. Keep the tone kind and encouraging, with the commitment to help each other improve. You can't change the feeling of disappointment, but you can show your 

4. Don't drag the conversation 

As much as possible, keep it brief. Don't need to over-explain yourself, come up with long-winded excuses, or be overly apologetic. If they seek clarification, clarify what you can. But after you've conveyed the key points, just end the session, to respectfully Give them time to think and process their emotions. 

5. Patience

At the core of all of these is to remain patient. Be strong, for "the strong person isn't one who overcomes others with his physical strength; rather, the strong person is one who controls himself when he is angry" (Al-Bukhari) 

Share this message to those who may be struggling with this matter. 

May Allah grant us the Sabr to conduct our responsibilities with Sabr, integrity and ihsan.