Tuesday, June 11, 2024

“Ego is the Enemy”: How Humility is one of the secret superpowers of being an extraordinary professional and a flat-out awesome human being




In the book “Good to Great”, author Jim Collins outlines that one of the key success factors of good-to-great companies was the presence of what he coins “Level 5 Leaders”. The surprising thing to me, though, was what was the main characteristics of Level 5 Leadership:


Humility. Modesty. Reserved. Gracious. 


Wait, what? Why? How does humility make one a more effective leader in business? 


In the book, “Ego is the Enemy”, author Ryan Holiday sheds light on multiple perspectives the opposite side of the spectrum: of how Ego and arrogance lead to failure:


"Ego is the enemy of what you want and of what you have: Of mastering a craft. Of real creative insight. Of working well with others. Of building loyalty and support. Of longevity. Of repeating and retaining your success. It repulses advantages and opportunities. It’s a magnet for enemies and errors". 


In his other book “How the Mighty Fall”, Jim Collins also writes about the common patterns of how big companies fall. 


And what is the first stage of decline? The first tell-tale sign of impending failure? 


Hubris (arrogance), born of success.


This outlines some practical wisdoms behind why Islam tells us to clean our hearts from the disease of arrogance. Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said,


“A person with a mustard seed’s worth of arrogance will not enter Paradise! (Arrogance is) to deny the truth, and look down on others” (Muslim)


The more I read about this subject, the more I'm convinced, that not only ego is the biggest barrier against success, but the other way around holds true: Humility may very well be one of the superpowers to be successful in life. 


Here are 10 aspects of Humility that reallly stood out. Being Humble enables us to:


1. Know when to put aside our self-importance, opinions or preferences, to prioritize a higher purpose and greater good. To have the maturity to accept the truth, even if that truth goes against our convenience, pride or desires. 

This makes us better team players & followers - to support and carry the vision of our leaders, as well as learning to Let Go for the greater good


2. B⁠e better learners & effective students


"The pretense of knowledge is our most dangerous vice, because it prevents us from getting any better. You can’t learn if you think you already know. You will not find the answers if you’re too conceited and self-assured to ask the questions. You cannot get better if you’re convinced you are the best." (Ego is the Enemy)


Humility enables us to develop a genuine sense of curiosity and a sincere desire to learn from others, not getting complacent with what we know. To Accept constructive criticism and tough feedback like a pro, not taking things personally. 

By extension, humility makes you a better student - by being more resilient in enduring your tough bosses, teachers, or seniors. And to have more courage to ask questions, without the egoistic fear of "looking stupid"



3. Be respectful, and hence more collaborative with others - even if you don't "like" someone, you have enough humility to put your personal preferences aside, find the common ground between yourselves to collaborate towards the greater good


4. Make you a genuinely better Listener - Not only by making room for silence and allowing others to speak instead of just waiting for your time to respond, humility lays the groundwork of curiosity and respect to be great at listening. 

This is why, in his book "Never Split the difference", author Chris Voss said “really smart people often have trouble being negotiators” 

    

Why? Ego.

    

“They’re so smart they think they don’t have anything to discover. Too often people find it easier just to stick with what they believe. Using what they’ve heard or their own biases, they often make assumptions about others even before meeting them."

    

7. Become more productive, have better self-development and Self-awareness - by accepting our own shortcomings, we become more objectively conscious about how we can improve ourselves and focus on “what can I do”, instead of being denial, blaming external circumstances or other people and ruminating in your plight and living with an entitlement mindset.


8. Be more appreciative: by preventing us from over-inflating our self-worth and attributing “success” to our own selves, humility helps us seek the good in others, acknowledge them, and say positive words of affirmation and recognition.


9. Forgive others - by putting "my ego" and "my rights" out of the equation, it enables us to objectively move on when others apologize, having the maturity to put aside our desire to seek revenge of payback just for personal gratification. 


10. Face situations of defeat with confidence and class, gracefully "losing" by keeping our head up high in the name of good sportsmanship, professionalism or simply to elevate those around us. Strategically, accepting defeat also allows us to pick our battles, knowing when to concede and to step down (i.e. “lose the battle, win the war”)


It’s interesting, when we reflect the above, we can see some wisdom behind why Prophet Muhammad ﷺ put so much emphasis on humility & modesty:


وَمَا تَوَاضَعَ أَحَدٌ لِلَّهِ إِلاَّ رَفَعَهُ اللَّهُ

“The one who shows humility, Allah will elevate him” (Muslim)


الْحَيَاءُ لاَ يَأْتِي إِلاَّ بِخَيْرٍ

“Al-Haya (modesty, shyness, humbleness) does not bring in anything except good” (Al-Bukhari)


وَمَا كَانَ الْحَيَاءُ فِي شَيْءٍ إِلاَّ زَانَهُ

“Whenever modesty is present in something, it beautifies it” (At-Tirmidzi)


Convinced? Do you agree, that the ingredients above can make you an extraordinary professional, and just a flat-out-awesome human being? Share your thoughts !

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