Thursday, August 03, 2023

What is your “wake”? What effect do you have upon others? - Recognizing value and impact of the morale effect.

 



One of our senior engineers recently resigned. It was a big loss to the organization, having lost someone very technically competent, experienced and possessing very effective people skills, one whom we had high hopes of becoming our future leader.


But what I found inspiring about her was the intangible value and impact she carried with her. It wasn’t only her technical capability, but she had another rare, amazing quality: She was able to inspire others around her.


Everyone who has had the experience of working with her, all of them always report an overwhelmingly positive working experience. From the juniors who found her as a very patient and encouraging teacher, to her peers who always enjoyed her company and cheerful vibe, to the other fellow seniors who consistently enjoy technical discussions with her very effective curious questions that made us think. All the while always maintaining a pleasant demeanor, and not being condescending. Her questions and comments always made us think. 


Looking back, one could say that her presence multiplied the creative and intellectual capacity of those around her.


During her farewell, one of our seniors said that at one point in the early years of his career, he contemplated resigning from the organization because of some negative experiences. But after he had the privilege to work under her as his senior, he had such a great experience that he changed his mind and decided to stay. That was 4 years ago. Basically, he’s still with us today, because of her. If you want to reframe her “value”, you could say that all of his past contributions to date, including those he will continue to add in the future, we can attribute it to her. 


Now, that’s impact. 


On the other side of the spectrum: how many people do we know of, who are very technically competent at what they do, yet seem to leave behind a trail of destruction in their wake? Those who become toxic influences in their environment? 


When people “deliver results” but burn bridges along the way, there are a lot of severe intangible consequences. 


In his book “Integrity: The Courage to Meet the Demands of Reality”, author Dr. Henry Cloud shares his experience mentoring a CEO of a company. His VP in sales was great at delivering business results, but there was only one problem: he had a problematic, “strong” personality that, although was driven and ambitious, tends to disrespect, running over them and seem to upset everyone around him - including two VPs who expressed their intention to leave because of this guy.


The author highlights that although it might “seem” on paper that the VP is “delivering”, but what we must consider is the expense that he is incurring: how many hours are wasted with people complaining about him? Stretch that out over the years, multiply that with the hourly rate of the manhours? How about the lost opportunity of what the people could have done if we hadn’t had to sort out these internal problems? Or the cost of finding two new VPs to replace those who are about to leave? 


Finally, he asked “Do you STILL feel like he is such a great deal?”


One of the roles of leaders is to have an appreciation to the morale effect of our team, and look beyond their individual contributions. 


This is where the author makes his point: The Wake we leave behind. The morale effect.


“Just as we leave the effects of our work behind in results, we leave the effects of our interactions with people behind in their hearts, minds, and souls. We leave a wake of people behind us as we move through their lives and their organizations. We leave a wake behind as we move through the lives of clients and partners.

We leave a wake behind as we move through our relationships with vendors and other alliances, as well as our entire industry. So, we must look out over the transom and ask ourselves, “What does that wake look like?”


Would (the people we interact with) say that their experience with us has left them better off for our having “moved through their lives,” or would they say that it has left them worse off? Did they consider it a blessing that they were associated with you, or a curse? What is the nature of the wake? Are they smiling or reeling?

Are they more trusting after working with us? Are they more fulfilled as people? Have they grown as a result of being associated with you? Do they feel better about themselves, and working with others? Did they learn from you and feel lifted up and encouraged? Were they stretched and inspired to become more than they were before they worked with or for you? Did your relationship cause them to produce more? Or, are they wounded? Less trusting? Feeling put down, cheated, or manipulated? Disappointed, let down, or lied to? Are they angry and just waiting for a chance to get even? Do they feel inferior, like a loser, or ashamed because of how you interacted with them? And the big question: “Would they want to do it again?” 


(End Quote)


This made me contemplate, to ask myself: As a leader, colleague, subordinate, a parent, a husband, a friend. One that I feel all of us SHOULD ask ourselves: 

What impact are am I leaving behind? What does MY wake look like? Have I made their lives better? 


So, my friend, what is your wake?

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