Count your Blessings: What Are You Grateful for About 2020?

 

Boy, what a year has it been, huh? 

There seems to be no shortage of negative remarks on how "terrible" or a “disaster” this year has been... Such as the beginning of this (somewhat motivational?) welcoming message at local Gym 😅

There tends to be an overemphasis on the negative that we have drowned ourselves in an escalating spiral of anxiety and worry, while criminally overlooking so many other great things in our lives that we should be grateful for. With this deteriorating morale, coupled with the "no end in sight" situation of the #COVID19 pandemic, it’s easy to see why mental health issues have gone on the rise. 

Despite the "crazy" stuff happening, it's high time we look on the bright side of life and give a healthy dose of optimism to our own mental health, with a simple gratitude exercise: What can we be grateful for? 

Get really intentional and mindful with the other Awesome stuff in our lives that we tend to take for granted, especially those which we know that others have been deprived of. We have so much that others wish they did! 

You don't have to proclaim it out loud; instead, do something better: sincerely express your gratitude by praising Allah for them. Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) said:

 مَا أَنْعَمَ اللَّهُ عَلَى عَبْدٍ نِعْمَةً فَقَالَ الْحَمْدُ لِلَّهِ إِلَّا كَانَ الَّذِي أَعْطَاهُ أَفْضَلَ مِمَّا أَخَذَ

“Whenever Allah bestows a blessing upon a slave, and he says: 'Alhamdulillah' (all praise is to Allah),' 

He gives what is better than that which he received (the blessing)." (Ibnu Majah)

Even those so-called "bad" things that have happened, there may be many great things that may have come from it, as a result. Adversities and tragedies, after all, tend to have a sneaky way of turning out to be opportunities and a source of great blessings in disguise, which we only figure out in retrospect when the dust has cleared. Perhaps we may not see it yet, but the wisdoms are there in the making.

وَعَسَىٰ أَنْ تَكْرَهُوا شَيْئًا وَهُوَ خَيْرٌ لَكُمْ ۖ وَعَسَىٰ أَنْ تُحِبُّوا شَيْئًا وَهُوَ شَرٌّ لَكُمْ ۗ وَاللَّـهُ يَعْلَمُ وَأَنْتُمْ لَا تَعْلَمُونَ

“Perhaps you may hate something, when it is in fact good for you; and perhaps you may love something but it is good for you. And Allah Knows, but you do not know” (Surah Al-Baqarah, 216)

When it comes to making du’aa and asking Allah, many of us tend to focus only on what we DON’T have, what we are lacking in, and to alleviate the difficulties that we are going through.

There is nothing wrong with that at all – in fact Allah Loves those who ask of Him - but what we tend to forget, is to ask Him to grant barakah (blessings) and retain those blessings that He already has granted to us. 

And as we have seen in these recent months, Will and Wisdom of Allah, the palpable reality of how He can snatch those blessings away at any moment, and how frail we really are at His Mercy.

That is why, the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ himself used to make the following du'aa :

اَللَّهُمَّ إِنِّي أَعُوذُ بِكَ مِنْ زَوَالِ نِعْمَتِكَ, وَتَحَوُّلِ عَافِيَتِكَ, وَفَجْأَةِ نِقْمَتِكَ, وَجَمِيعِ سَخَطِكَ

“O Allah! I seek refuge in You against the declining of Your Favours, the passing of safety & well-being, the suddenness of Your punishment and all that which displeases You” (Muslim)

May Allah retain and bless all the favours He has granted us and our families, and may He reward the patience of those in times of distress and alleviate their suffering.

So, what are the things you are grateful for?

وَإِذْ تَأَذَّنَ رَبُّكُمْ لَئِنْ شَكَرْتُمْ لَأَزِيدَنَّكُمْ ۖ وَلَئِنْ كَفَرْتُمْ إِنَّ عَذَابِي لَشَدِيدٌ

And (remember) when your Lord proclaimed: "If you give thanks (by accepting Faith and worshipping none but Allah), I will give you more (of My Blessings), but if you are ungrateful and disbelieve, verily! My Punishment is indeed severe." (Surah Ibrahim, 14:7)

Efforts versus Results: How should we be evaluated in Performance Reviews? #YearEndReview #EPM #PPA #PerformanceAppraisal

Efforts versus Results: How should we be evaluated in Performance Reviews? #YearEndReview #EPM #PPA #PerformanceAppraisal

(note: Long Post ~ 10 minute read)

This is a common dilemma that affects corporate organizations at all levels.

Reflecting back on my own working experience, I recall being assigned several tasks where I had minimal actual effort done – just a few days of work – but because it involved a scope from a high-production facilities, it became a very high visibility task and therefore on paper was perceived as a task with a huge impact. Much to the delight of the team members involved. Yay!

On the other hand, I have also received several assignments that involved a lot of effort, many weeks of detailed work, collaboration and interfacing with multiple stakeholders, only to discover and conclude that an engineering proposal is “not feasible” or does not result in substantial “value creation”, which we ended up having to drop.

On paper: That work resulted in virtually zero value.

On the ground: We receive sarcastic remarks for “wasting time and resources for doing this work”, even though it was our must-do core job. “Buat habih boreh je”

What gives?

When it comes to Results, there are in fact many different things that affect the bottom line – and although there are many things which may be influenced by our individual efforts or actions (i.e. what is in our control), there are many more that are completely beyond our control. Weather, market conditions, facilities conditions, resource limitations, information/data unavailability, competency of fellow team members, other collaborating departments, or circumstantially high stake-crisis situations, just to name a few. All of these fall under the general heading of those outside of our control: I call this the Qadar of Allah – some may call this “luck”.

Would it be justified to "blame" individuals for factors beyond their control?

In fact, for many cases, the choice of assignments might be completely beyond the employee’s control. If they are assigned with tasks that have a “meh” impact, in spite of their diligent efforts, do they really deserve a “meh” performance rating, especially coming from their superior who accepted and assigned the task in the first place?

I remember having assigned a major project assignment and told to “drop everything else you are doing now”, only to receive instructions at the end of the year to “remove it from your performance appraisal” because the project was “controversial”.

True enough, that year, I suffered the worst performance rating of my career.

Totally my fault, right?

It starts with the “Why” of appraisals: What is the purpose behind employee performance evaluations in the first place? Who or what is really being evaluated here?

We can critique any “system” as much as we want, but at the core of it, performance appraisals crash and burn because when the PEOPLE implementing them failed or lost the plot. There is no perfect system; and even if there was a perfect one, it still goes back to HOW it was implemented.

If the objective is indeed to gauge the employee’s individual performance, identify gaps for improvement, and subsequently linking it to the overall vision, mission, culture and goals of the organization, then the focus should be on “what is in their control”: What were their contributions to achieve the bottom line? How can I tell if this employee is flourishing or merely functioning, as opposed to just riding on the popularity of the projects that I assigned to him? If I were to swap them with someone else, what differentiates them from the rest?

All of that essentially boils down to one concept: Effort.

As Batman once said, “it’s what I DO that defines me.”

Many superiors tend to have mixed feelings, sometimes even downright dismissing the role of “effort” altogether, perhaps even go to the extent of weaponizing the concept that “Results Matter” and that it’s all about the bottom line. I remember when I first joined as a fresh graduate, I overheard bosses exclaiming that “effort is meaningless if it doesn’t produce results” and “challenges are irrelevant”. At first glance, it sounds like ruthless one-liners by a villain from a 90s flick. To be fair though, I can empathize with where they are coming from. They don’t want “effort” and “challenges” to be used as an excuse for a lack of meaningful impact. Also, objectively speaking, they may have a point from a productivity point of view. As we learn in physics: Distance doesn’t mean displacement. Makes sense.

But then again: is it squarely employees’ faults for meaningless efforts – especially when the employers or superiors send them on a wild goose chase with in the first place?

As much as possible, performance evaluation should be focused on gauging the efforts in one’s control, especially considering the underlying situational and contextual challenges.

But gauging “effort” is challenging, isn’t it? How will the leader differentiate between a “genuine challenge” or “excuses”? Especially with people who are just oh-so-sweet with their words and colorful performance writeups? How will leaders meaningfully measure efforts to see through the fog of a sugar-coated writeup?

The key is to start on the right foot, in the first place: Set performance metrics which are objective, and that effectively measures the efforts in a way that is meaningful to the bottom line, i.e. the Results, and sufficiently challenges the employees to distinguish their individual contributions, taking into account internal and external factors that may affect the employees, both positive and negative. For some job tasks, some “Results” can be directly correlated with Effort: and in those cases, targets can be easier to set. But for more complex and sophisticated work assignments, it isn’t so straightforward.

In the same way you don’t give a high school exam to a preschooler, you cannot just slap on a copy-paste KPI template of a veteran as you do towards a fresh graduate and in the end, blame the new guy for underperforming. Or one who has gone on a 4-month maternity leave – hence not being present for one-third of the year – to be measured equally with others who were present in a full 12-month period.

And as performance reviews take place between subordinates, evaluate them in consideration of the context, situations and challenges that took place to gauge and review expectations accordingly to adequately assess.

Sounds tough…?

Yes, leadership is challenging. But lack of leadership is even more challenging for everyone else.

In Islam, performance evaluation is all about EFFORT: Leave the Results – and all the external factors beyond our control – to Allah. This is the essence of Tawakkul (Trust in Allah).

It is your Effort that showcases who you really are, beyond what is simply “given” to you by Allah. There are many examples that showcase this:

1. Repentance – In the story of the man who killed 99 people, the man sincerely sought repentance, went to migrate to another town to a conducive environment, but he died halfway there. He hasn’t even changed or even arrived at the destination – no “results”: he basically died “on the way”! – yet Allah accepted his repentance, by virtue of his efforts, to die on the path. (Ref: Al-Bukhari, Muslim).

2. Reward of Qur’an: The Prophet ﷺ promised that, for the person who is struggling with difficulty trying to recite Qur’an, he will receive double rewards, motivating to keep trying. Furthermore, in another hadith, he said “the best of you are those who LEARN the Qur’an and TEACH it”. The characteristic of the “best” are linked to verbs – actions – of learning and teaching. Meaning, even if you are very proficient or skilled in Qur’an, but stop the EFFORT learning or teaching, then you have lost the privilege of being the best (Ref: Al-Bukhari, Muslim).

3. Rewards are proportional to their difficulty and challenges – in a hadith, the Prophet ﷺ describes that towards the end of times, the life of a Muslim will be so difficult that it will be like holding on to burning coals; therefore the one who holds steadfastly in his faith and works righteousness will receive the reward equivalent to FIFTY companions of the Prophet ﷺ, the best of generations, the likes of Abu Bakr and Umar (Ref: Abu Daud and At-Tirmidzi).

4. Da’wah (calling others to the path of Allah) – in a hadith, Prophet Muhammad ﷺ described that the nations and the previous prophets were shown to him, and he witnessed that there are prophets with one follower, and even a prophet with zero followers. (ref: Al-Bukhari). Yet they are still affirmed by Allah as the best of mankind, in spite of the “lack of Results”. It is worth noting that Prophet Ibrahim (Abraham), even he barely had followers in his lifetime; he once said to his wife Sara, “I do not know of any other believer in this land besides you and me” (Ref: Muslim). Yet Allah described him as an ummah (a nation) by himself (ref: Surah An-Nahl 16:120). It was his dedicated efforts that Allah granted the barakah through his children Ishaq and Ismail to be the father of the Prophets..

5. Disbelieving Family members – in the Qur’an Allah describes how many Prophets were tried with those in their household who disbelieved, despite their best attempts to guide them. The most striking examples were the wives of Prophet Lut and Prophet Nuh (surah At-Tahrim, 66:10), and the uncle of Prophet Muhammad himself, Abu Talib. But they are not held accountable for their family members' disbelief.

6. Iman and Amal Soleh – a repeated theme in the Qur’an, Allah always pairs iman with righteous deeds: the actions.

As Muslims we can find solace in the fact that Allah rewards us for our efforts: as long as you have sincerity, and perform the deeds correctly to the best of your ability (i.e. all of which is within your control), then that’s it: None of it goes to waste, and that’s all that matters.

إِنَّ الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا وَعَمِلُوا الصَّالِحَاتِ إِنَّا لَا نُضِيعُ أَجْرَ مَنْ أَحْسَنَ عَمَلًا

“Verily! As for those who believe and do righteous deeds, certainly! We shall not suffer to be lost the reward of anyone who does his (righteous) deeds in the most perfect manner.” (Surah Al-Kahf, 18:30)

But the best part: in those instances you DO get great results, when Allah plants His barakah on your deeds and give the mileage of Results – e.g. charity or knowledge which was greatly benefitted from, successful da’wah – you WILL get the rewards!

In a nutshell:

EFFORT – based on clearly defined expectations and objective measurement – those define who you are. Results are a mechanism to REWARD, not to punish.

Perhaps we can learn a thing or two to implement this in our workplace.

What do you think?

#PerformanceEvaluation #thebarakaheffect

The Driving Force Behind Da’wah: Compassion towards others to save them, beyond "just delivering the message" – A Lesson from Surah Al-Kahf

 

Although the primary function of Muhammad ﷺ was to serve as a Messenger (Rasul) to deliver the message of Allah’s Final Revelation on Earth, he didn’t simply treat his role as a “postman” to deliver from point A to point B, and that’s it.

No, he had a much deeper level of ownership in his task than that: genuine compassion towards those he calls to, in order to save them. As a Prophet receiving revelation of the unseen, he has witnessed the horrors of the punishment of the grave, the day of judgment, of hellfire, and hence his ﷺ saying:

وَالَّذِي نَفْسُ مُحَمَّدٍ بِيَدِهِ لَوْ تَعْلَمُونَ مَا أَعْلَمُ لَبَكَيْتُمْ كَثِيرًا، وَلَضَحِكْتُمْ قَلِيلاً

"I Swear by Him in Whose Hand Muhammad's soul is, if you know that which I know, you would weep much and laugh little." (Al-Bukhari)

Bearing witness with his own eyes of the eventuality of those who die in a state of shirik and disbelief, his sense of empathy towards them makes him feel anxious to save them from these horrors, while they still have the chance in this life. And in this ayah #6 in surah Al-Kahf, Allah provides an insight into the emotions of Prophet Muhammad ﷺ as he is continuously rejected by his people.

This feeling of anxiety is so great, to the point where he would die out of grief over them for turning away, until Allah Himself had to console his feelings of grief to remind him that his job is only to convey:

فَلَعَلَّكَ بَاخِعٌ نَفْسَكَ عَلَىٰ آثَارِهِمْ إِنْ لَمْ يُؤْمِنُوا بِهَٰذَا الْحَدِيثِ أَسَفًا

“Perhaps you will destroy yourself out of grief following after them because they did not believe in this speech (i.e. this Qur’an)” (18:6)

As-Sa’di said commenting on this verse: “Since the Prophet ﷺ was keen that the creation be guided and expended his greatest efforts to achieve that, he would be very happy when people were guided and sad when the disbelievers were not, as an expression of his compassion, deep sympathy and pity for them. Thus, Allah advised him to not worry himself with grief and sadness for those who disbelieved in the Qur’aan.” (Taysir Al-Karim ar-Rahman)

Ibn Kathir explained that this verse meant: “Do not feel sorry for them, just convey the message from Allah to them. Whoever goes the right way benefits himself and whoever goes astray only harms himself. So do not destroy yourself in sorrow over them.” (Tafsir Ibn Kathir)

What can we learn from this?

The paradigm and driving force behind calling others to the path of Allah should be built upon compassion, not simply convey to “tick the box” and get it over and done with. Not out of spite, a burdened feeling of obligation or personal gratification.

If we base our da’wah on compassion, then much like guiding our own children, we will keep trying to the extent of our abilities, and not easily give up. When others reject our call, those feelings of sadness is not because they reject us personally, but because they are rejecting their means of true success and happiness, and it saddens us to live with the thought that they may take choices that lead down a path of despair.  

While at the same time, we recognize the bitter reality that we have no control over their hearts, and that even our Prophet ﷺ - the best of mankind, could not guide his own uncle Abu Talib who had raised him and protected him well into his old age.

Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said,

إِنَّمَا مَثَلِي وَمَثَلُ النَّاسِ كَمَثَلِ رَجُلٍ اسْتَوْقَدَ نَارًا، فَلَمَّا أَضَاءَتْ مَا حَوْلَهُ جَعَلَ الْفَرَاشُ وَهَذِهِ الدَّوَابُّ الَّتِي تَقَعُ فِي النَّارِ يَقَعْنَ فِيهَا، فَجَعَلَ يَنْزِعُهُنَّ وَيَغْلِبْنَهُ فَيَقْتَحِمْنَ فِيهَا، فَأَنَا آخُذُ بِحُجَزِكُمْ عَنِ النَّارِ، وَأَنْتُمْ تَقْتَحِمُونَ فِيهَا

"The analogy of myself and the example of the people is that of a man who made a fire, and when it lit what was around it, Moths and other insects started falling into the fire. 

The man tried (his best) to prevent them, (from falling in the fire) but they overpowered him and rushed into the fire. 

Now, similarly, I take hold of the knots at your waist (belts) to prevent you from falling into the Fire, but you insist on falling into it." (Al-Bukhari)

Spencer Glendon: the Inspiring Story of Triumph in Adversity by #1: Embracing who we are, #2 Doing one small habit at a time over time, and #3: Having meaningful relationships

“Build one habit at a time. Success is sequential, not simultaneous. No one actually has the discipline to acquire more than one powerful new habit at a time. Super-successful people aren’t superhuman at all; they’ve just used selected discipline to develop a few significant habits. One at a time. Over time.” 

(Quote from “The ONE Thing: The surprisingly simple truth behind extraordinary results”, Gary Keller)

In high school, Spencer Glendon suffered from chronic ulcerative colitis. This led to serious progressive liver problems. He eventually needed a transplant, which he got from a good friend. But organ transplants mean immunosuppressive therapy. Basically, he has no immune system. Colds that would give you and I a stuffy nose left him bedridden for a week. When most of us feel under the weather, we push on through with coffee and willpower, but for Spencer there was no negotiating with his body. It would fail him and he would be bedridden again. 

Sounds awful, huh? 

But this is exactly what made Spencer awesome. As he likes to say, “I’ve had what I think of as the good fortune to be physically compromised almost through my entire life.” You’re probably thinking the same thing I am: Huh? 

When he was in high school and seriously ill, he went to see a therapist. He wanted to do the things all young people want to do: go to parties, date, play sports. Often they just weren’t realistic options. And it was heartbreaking. His therapist couldn’t lie to him. Spencer couldn’t live a life like his peers. 

But that didn’t mean he had to be miserable. The therapist told him to focus on accomplishing one thing a day. If he could do just that one thing, he could feel good about himself. His energy was limited, but if he focused on just one thing, he could still do some of what he wanted. 

So that’s what he did. Sometimes it was just making dinner. If he could cook dinner that night he would have accomplished something. He had to quit a lot of activities, but he could still achieve one thing. He would do the one thing that day, and one thing the next, and the next. Now, when he’s at his sickest, he still makes dinner. (Unsurprisingly, he’s also become a great cook.)

Coming to terms with his illness taught him something that almost all of us overlook: Everything we do in life is a trade-off. Choosing to do one thing means not doing something else.

Today, Spencer Glendon is a Fulbright Scholar, earned a Ph.D. in economics from Harvard, helped charities on the South Side of Chicago, and is currently a partner at one of the biggest money management funds in Massachusetts. 

(Excerpt from “Barking Up The Wrong Tree: The Surprising Science Behind Why Everything You Know About Success is [Mostly] Wrong” by Eric Baker)

Emphasizing #ThePowerOfHabit #AtomicHabits , it is the small, qualitative choices we make, and the ones we choose to do consistently in our day to day lives that eventually shape who we become, despite the adversity or problems in our circumstance. Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said,

وَأَنَّ أَحَبَّ الأَعْمَالِ أَدْوَمُهَا إِلَى اللَّهِ، وَإِنْ قَلَّ 

"the most beloved deeds to Allah are the ones done consistently, even if they are small" 

(Narrated by Al-Bukhari)

But what really stood out to me about his story was about embracing our limitations. Despite his severe illnesses with a “valid excuse” to simply live a life of survival, especially with the inability to “enjoy life” like his peers, Spencer simply kept moving forward in life with what he had, improving one small aspect at a time until he scored multiple achievements and contributions that even relatively healthy people don’t do.

Just because we are deprived from something, it doesn’t mean we need to live with a Victim mindset: to feel upset, depressed, envious of others. Rather we should embrace who we are, accept our limitations and move on. Focus on what we CAN do, what we can achieve. 

We can apply this life lesson to all circumstances: No matter what states of difficulty you may be in, it is your conscious choice to make the best of what you have is the secret to a life of fulfillment, success and happiness. 

In the context of religion, this is the essence of Islam (submission). When a Muslim EMBRACES Islam, one embraces the limitations – whatever the shari’ah has deemed as prohibited / haram – not simply because one “doesn’t have a choice”, but out of acknowledgement that the One Creator had imposed these prohibitions because He Knows Best what is good for us (even if our desires may not “like” it), and we put our full trust in Him! 

This is the wisdom behind the description of the Prophet ﷺ regarding the believer:

الدُّنْيَا سِجْنُ الْمُؤْمِنِ وَجَنَّةُ الْكَافِرِ

“The life of this world is a prison for the believer and Paradise for the disbeliever” (Muslim)

Finally, another really inspiring aspect of Spencer’s story is the importance of meaningful relationships. It was his therapist that gave him the secret sauce to his eventual path to success – one thing at a time – but above that, the author highlights at the book’s conclusion, Spencer’s amazing life had one more secret weapon up his sleeve: a BFF who saved his life. 

“Relationships not only improve success; they can save your life. Remember Spencer Glendon and his health issues? I mentioned he received a liver transplant. When he first fell seriously ill, the doctors knew he might eventually need a new liver and his friends were all tested to see if any were a match. (The liver is unique in that it regenerates; so both donor and recipient will eventually grow a full organ with time.) 

His friend Carl was a good match. Years went by and Spencer’s health continued to decline. The doctors said they had run out of options. Spencer would require a transplant. 

Carl didn’t merely volunteer. He revealed that ever since the positive donor match, he had quietly been on a dedicated regimen of diet and exercise. He’d spent the past few years getting himself into peak shape so that when the time came, he could give Spencer the healthiest liver possible. 

Because of Carl’s sneaky plan, both friends are healthy and happy today. I hope you and I are lucky enough to have friends like Carl. 

If you align your knowledge of yourself with your career and the people around you, it can form an upward spiral that leads to not only career success but also happiness and fulfillment.” (End Quote)

Wow. 

The Prophet ﷺ said,

لَا يُؤْمِنُ أَحَدُكُمْ حَتَّى يُحِبَّ لِأَخِيهِ مَا يُحِبُّ لِنَفْسِهِ

“None of you [truly] believes until he loves for his brother that which he loves for himself.” (Al-Bukhari, Muslim)

مَثَلُ الْجَلِيسِ الصَّالِحِ وَالْجَلِيسِ السَّوْءِ كَمَثَلِ صَاحِبِ الْمِسْكِ، وَكِيرِ الْحَدَّادِ، لاَ يَعْدَمُكَ مِنْ صَاحِبِ الْمِسْكِ إِمَّا تَشْتَرِيهِ، أَوْ تَجِدُ رِيحَهُ، وَكِيرُ الْحَدَّادِ يُحْرِقُ بَدَنَكَ أَوْ ثَوْبَكَ أَوْ تَجِدُ مِنْهُ رِيحًا خَبِيثَةً

"The example of a good companion (who sits with you) in comparison with a bad one, is like that of the seller of perfume and the blacksmith; 

From the first (seller of perfume) you would either buy the perfume, or enjoy its good smell (by simply being in his company); 

while (hanging out with) the blacksmith would either burn your body or your clothes, or you get a bad nasty smell from being in his company." (Narrated by Al-Bukhari)

“Just make du’aa for me” – Response to Gratitude

When our fellow Muslims thank or express gratitude to a person, or perhaps when they say something like "I don't know how to repay you", sometimes one may give this response: "just make du'aa for me". 

At times it can be very subtle: we tell the person “جَزَاكَ اللّٰهُ خَيْرًا” (may Allah reward you with good) per the sunnah, the person says, “doakan ana”. 

At first glance, it seems like a very positive response: I don’t want any tangible rewards or payment, I just want your du’aa. Sounds innocent and sincere, masha Allah. 

Plot twist: This response is actually not appropriate. When we ask others to “make du’aa for me” after we have done a favor for them, this automatically implies we are expecting something in return, hence this request actually contradicts true ikhlas (sincerity). By right, our thoughts should be as the ones modelled by what Allah describes as the Abrar (the righteous) in the Qur’an: 

إِنَّمَا نُطْعِمُكُمْ لِوَجْهِ اللَّهِ لَا نُرِيدُ مِنكُمْ جَزَاءً وَلَا شُكُورًا

"We provide you with food, seeking only the Face of Allah. We do not wish from you any recompense nor any thanks" (Al-Insan 76:9)

Also: Ever noticed also how sometimes, when people share tips and knowledge online or in forums, they sarcastically say at the end: “you can thank me later”? 

So annoying. 

Likewise, as a self-reminder, to prevent ourselves from being instilled with this “gratitude entitlement” mindset, we have to be careful not to state “make du’aa for me” when we do a favor for others, as an indirect and implicit means to remind others to be grateful and solicit their appreciation. 

(Note: This is different from a general request of others to make du’aa for us in times of need such as sickness, success in exams, trials in difficulty, or overcoming any challenges, when there is no aspect of gratitude / recompense in the picture. Those ones, no worries.. Go ahead.)

Making du’aa for others in secret is an amazing act of righteousness and should be done from the heart out of sincere gratitude. The Prophet ﷺ said, 

وَمَنْ صَنَعَ إِلَيْكُمْ مَعْرُوفًا فَكَافِئُوهُ فَإِنْ لَمْ تَجِدُوا مَا تُكَافِئُونَهُ فَادْعُوا لَهُ حَتَّى تَرَوْا أَنَّكُمْ قَدْ كَافَأْتُمُوهُ‏

“If anyone does an act of kindness for you, repay him; but if you have not the means to do so, pray for him until you feel that you have compensated him. 

(Narrated by Abu Daud, graded sahih by Al-Albani)

How Important is “Visibility” in employee performance?

 

One of my bosses used to say, “When it comes to performance appraisal, this is not a beauty pageant. You will not be judged based on how visible you are, but instead on your merit and contribution”

Among the biggest pain points I have observed and experienced of employee performance in the corporate world is this little thorn called “visibility”.

Perhaps this may sound familiar to you: high performing, staff who have nailed and exceeded all KPI but being denied good performance ratings or promotion because they were “not visible enough”.

(Though it tends to make us wonder – does it work the other way around, in favor of the highly visible employee? Can the visible superstar simply go for a stroll and ride on the wave of popularity, by virtue of his/her shiny performance write-up?)

This is a touchy sensitive subject, especially for those who feel they are not very visible in the organization or the team, perceiving they have a built-in handicap or "unseen force" that holds them back. I’ve been there, and yes, it burns.

So let’s honestly give is some thought: how important is visibility?

The key is goal-setting and setting clear expectations of what is expected from an employee. If visibility is indeed an integral part of the job itself, then place it as part of the employee’s performance targets and KPI. If it’s not relevant, don’t turn the job into a beauty pageant.

However, a couple of things to keep in mind if you DO consider visibility important:

Firstly, let the employees know upfront and well in advance at the start of the year, so they may prepare for it. Not just a shocker “plot twist” you shoot them at the end of the year end performance review, or those final triumphant moments when they are due for promotion.

Secondly, by integrating visibility into the KPI, you need an apple-to-apple benchmark: allow fair opportunity for the employees to project their visibility. We cannot put everyone on the same pedestal if the nature of their job scopes aren’t on a level playing field.

Some job scopes are naturally more visible than others. For some of us whose jobs are highly technical in nature, these assignments don’t really require or impose us to make frequent presentations or interfacing with management, such as my current job assignment as a discipline process engineer in a project team working mainly simulation, design, and calculation to support project proposal works behind the scenes. For us to get ourselves visible outside of our teams requires us to go the extra mile to volunteer additional tasks of presentation and coordination.

But for some job responsibilities, presentations are their bread and butter: their day-to-day job has high visibility by design. They frequently require interfacing with high-level stakeholders, leadership teams and partners. Some job designations are tasked with the “final sign off” with the clients and are guaranteed to get the achievement photograph that gets splashed on the front page. For these jobs, visibility isn’t an “extra effort”; it is a given if you simply show up and do your job.

Thirdly, and this is perhaps most important, one may probably be wondering: “How would you measure visibility?”
Therein lies another problem: Visibility is highly subjective, and dependent on perception, hence does not have truly fair metrics to be measured. Bosses, too, have limitations: A person may be considered “visible” by superiors who are familiar with one’s work, but completely unknown to others. Take the other extreme: A person may be considered visible by virtue of social smoking or golfing with the higher ups. A person might be “famous” for winning the company karaoke competition, or for organizing the company gala dinner.

But you have to honestly ask: are all of these visibility acts relevant to consider a staff a “high performer”, or promotion?
An organization putting too much undue importance on subjective visibility without clear prioritization is at a risk of moving away from the emphasis of a high-performance culture, and instead inspire a culture of ostentatious employees who act purely for publicity. You might accidentally promote superficial things that, in reality, don’t actually matter and are completely irrelevant to their core job deliverables, but can get them noticed or save them from poor performance ratings. In Malay slang language, I believe the term is “capab” (cari publisiti).

Finally: whose responsibility is “visibility”, anyway?
What role do the superiors, bosses, employers play in recognizing the work of their own subordinates? Is it correct for the employees themselves to be 100% responsibility for their own visibility?

No matter how perfect you setup your performance appraisal systems, as human beings with limitations, a perception bias is inevitable. As objective as you try to make the performance targets or promotional criteria, you will still have a little factor that relies on your perceptions to make a judgment call on a person’s “worthiness”, and that still has visibility play a small, subconscious role.

People judge based on what they know. And if one doesn’t know much, or perceive matters based on an incomplete picture, one cannot make good decisions.
But we can do something to work around this limitation: and this is where the superior’s responsibilities come in. At its most basic, superiors need to make the time and put in the effort to recognize their subordinates’ works. Regularly engage your team in a consistent, structured manner: as a platform to understand the challenges, pain points they go through and efforts they put in, clearly communicate expectations (including visibility expectations), exchange feedback towards continuous improvement, and identify how they can facilitate or optimize the team’s resources to perform their jobs better.

Simple steps like regular engagements not only improve the leaders’ visibility of their teams but allow them to simultaneously build an atmosphere of trust; not just whooping out the sledgehammer during year-end performance reviews because they are “not visible enough”.
Perhaps, if done right, visibility may no longer even be relevant.

But what if superiors don’t have time to engage their subordinate teams? Too busy with meetings and engagements?
If effective leadership and management of subordinates is your core job, “no time” is not a valid excuse. Tasks that are your core responsibility – your fardhu ain – things like this, you don’t “find time”, ya sheikh. You make time.

Don’t penalize others for your own failures. “Not visible” and “not taking the effort to see” are two different things.
Besides, why are managers paid more if they don’t manage? What kind of a leader doesn’t lead?
Leadership failure leads to the evolution of performance appraisals into a beauty pageant.

Even if your performance appraisals become a beauty pageant, are you fit to judge the contest if you didn’t even show up in the first place?
Food for thought.

The Muslim Perspective
Ala kulli hal, as a Muslim, I always remind myself that the one most important performance evaluation: the appraisal of our lives, the one in which we stand in front of Allah to be answerable for our deeds in this life to determine one of two destinations: Jannah or Jahannam. Seventeen times in a day, we recite
مَالِكِ يَوْمِ الدِّينِ
“The Only Owner (and King) of the Day of Recompense” (Surah Al-Fatihah 1:4)

From a work perspective, this verse should give us the motivating (and scary) reminder that even though some bosses or organizations might overlook one’s contributions, Allah never overlooks them. Any oppression will be recompensed and repaid – if not in this annual appraisal, in this employment, or in this life, definitely in the next.

From a life perspective as a whole, this verse also reminds us where we should be really channeling our efforts for this performance review with Allah: I don’t have to worry how visible I am. I only have to worry about preparing myself, based on the clear performance expectations outlined in the shari’ah, without ambiguity. We know exactly what to do, and how to find out what to do, i.e. from the Qur’an and sunnah: the onus is 100% upon us to learn, act, and share. The challenge though, is that we don't know "where we are" and "when is the deadline" (i.e. death) - so we just have to keep moving forward and improving!

Share your thoughts! What do you think: is visibility important or relevant in employee performance?
Have you encountered sticky situations due to visibility? Any tips or advice? How do you manage visibility in your team?

#YearEndReview #PerformanceManagement #PerformanceAppraisal #EPM #TheBarakahEffect

A few words can change the trajectory of another’s life

 

Have you ever contemplated upon how deeply our words can affect others?

Around the 100th year after hijrah (around the early 8th century, CE) in the city of Kufah, Iraq, there was a young man by Nu’man. Raised in a family of merchants, Nu’man did not grow up in the pursuit of Islamic sciences with a scholarly background. He was groomed towards becoming a proficient businessman, much like his father before him. 

One day on the way to the markets, Nu’man passed by a scholar by the name of Ash-Sha’bi, who was a tabi’ee, a student to the companions of the Prophet Muhammadﷺ. Ash-Sha’bi asked the young man, “who are you going to?”

Nu’man replied that he was on the way to see another merchant. Ash-Sha’bi said, “I am not referring to you going to the market. I meant which scholars do you go to see to seek knowledge?”

Nu’man, who realized that the Sheikh thought that he was a student of knowledge, then said, “Oh, I hardly ever attend any of their classes”

Ash-Sha’bi then said, “I can see signs of intelligence and energy in you. You should seek knowledge and sit in the company of learned men.”

Nu’man said, “His advice left an impact in my heart. Ever since then, I left behind turning to the market, and instead turned to the pursuit of knowledge. Thus, Allah benefitted me through Ash-Sha’bi’s advice.”

Thus began his journey in Islamic scholarship. Despite only starting his pursuit of knowledge well into his adult years, his dedication and passion eventually nurtured him to become one of the greatest scholars in Islamic history. 

This young man’s full name is Nu’man ibn Thabit, otherwise known as Abu Hanifah. 

Yes, the great Imam Abu Hanifah, one of the four prominent imams of the mazhabs (schools of Islamic jurisprudence), of whom at least one third of the Muslim nation today attribute their following, the Hanafi mazhab.

His entire pursuit of scholarship can be traced back to be the result of the encouraging words from the random encounter of one person, ash-Sha’bi. Imagine the mountains of rewards that Allah will effortlessly reward Ash-Sha’bi on the Day of Judgment because of his few words in this life-changing moment!

This is indeed from the barakah (blessings) from Allah due to a person’s sincere advice. This is as Prophet Isa (Jesus) alayhissalam said,

وَجَعَلَنِي مُبَارَكًا أَيْنَ مَا كُنْتُ

“And He (Allah) has made me blessed (mubarak) where I may go” (Surah Maryam 19:31)

Why was Prophet Isa “blesssed”? What does this mean?

In the books of tafsir, the early scholars stated that this means, "And He made me a teacher of goodness”, “A person of great benefit”, and “commanding good and forbidding evil wherever he was”

In other words, he was blessed because of his ACTIONS, and therein lies a practical lesson for us: This is how we can attain barakah from Allah. Keep on giving good advice, words of encouragement, and beneficial reminders. 

You never know which one will stick: which ones will Allah add His barakah to, and grant His Guidance. 

Don’t worry about how many people “like”, “share”, or even respond to your calls. Worry about how sincere and how much effort you put into that advice. Leave the rest to Allah.  

I personally can recall how many people have had a profound impact on my life because of their words of advice for me. I recall an incident that happened over 11 years ago, where I was eating out with a few friends. One of our friends, who just learnt a hadith of the Prophet ﷺ, observed my sloppy manners of eating, not finishing my food, with bits and pieces of food and grains of rice remaining on my plate when I was done. 

Lowering his voice, he told me personally, “brother, can I give you some advice? Please do not take any offence, ya. You really should finish up your food and don’t leave bits and pieces of food like that on the plate to waste, because the Prophet ﷺ said, 

فَإِنَّهُ لاَ يَدْرِي فِي أَىِّ طَعَامِهِ تَكُونُ الْبَرَكَةُ ‏

“..(you) do not know in where the barakah (blessing) lies in your food.” (Muslim)

That advice really impacted me and from that moment on, I make an effort to finish my food completely at every meal to seek Allah’s barakah, to the extent that I started getting very uncomfortable when I observe people not finishing their food and would “help” others so we do not get deprived from the barakah. 

So much so that until today, my mom considers me “DBKL” (KL city municipal) because I help “clean up” the dinner table. 

I have so much positive jealousy for this brother who gave me this advice! For more than 10 years (and counting), all of those times I finished up my meals in conscious efforts to uphold this sunnah, he gets a share of that reward effortlessly, because of that one moment of advice. 

And the more I think about the impact of those around me – my parents, teachers, good company of friends – it humbles me to feel a sense of gratitude for helping me shape the person I am today.

Which really got me thinking and wondering: How much impact have I had on others? What have I left behind that has left a mark that can be a source of my investment for success Hereafter? To my wife? My son? The rest of my family? My friends? My colleagues?

Be mindful of what we say, because the impact of our words can swing the other way around too: if we aren’t careful, it could be a source of punishment against us. The Prophet ﷺ said,

إِنَّ الْعَبْدَ لَيَتَكَلَّمُ بِالْكَلِمَةِ مِنْ رِضْوَانِ اللَّهِ لاَ يُلْقِي لَهَا بَالاً، يَرْفَعُ اللَّهُ بِهَا دَرَجَاتٍ، وَإِنَّ الْعَبْدَ لَيَتَكَلَّمُ بِالْكَلِمَةِ مِنْ سَخَطِ اللَّهِ لاَ يُلْقِي لَهَا بَالاً يَهْوِي بِهَا فِي جَهَنَّمَ

“A slave (of Allah) may utter a word which pleases Allah without giving it much importance, but because of that Allah will raise him to degrees (of reward)! 

A slave (of Allah) may utter a word (carelessly) which displeases Allah without thinking of how heavy it is, and because of that he will be thrown into the Hell-Fire." (Al-Bukhari)

Who do you know of in your life that has had a huge impact on you? What were their words and actions that helped shape you who are today? 

How has that shaped your life in how you treat others?

#thePowerOfWords #theBarakahEffect

With Typos Like These… 🐸 Bad Attitude, or Hyper-intelligence? 💡🤔

 

I used to get really annoyed when I encounter glaring typos on official documents and presentations. Presentations with wrong dates, contradicting information (sometimes on the same slide!). The worst offender I have seen was a memo to be approved by VP, wherein the title itself contained a typo: the company name.

And the reason for my annoyance was my perception that typos communicate a careless, poor-quality attitude. Sure, we make mistakes and we are human beings, and we can easily forgive the genuine oversight that happens occasionally – I know I myself am guilty of this too. But sometimes, the typos are so obvious, numerous, embarassing and cringeworthy that it indicates something else entirely: an “I don’t care” attitude. The kind of attitude that makes you wonder: how can one put his/her name on that document, let alone the company logo, on this hot mess?

If you can’t be bothered to put in the effort and time to spell-check your product from obvious typo errors, that makes me doubt that you did ANY quality check at all. It almost feels disrespectful to my time to have to go through that document or presentation, with the tainted impression that it has been so severely compromised.

But these days, I have since learned to handle it with a bit more optimism and tolerance. Firstly, have a good laugh out of it, if you can. (Toads triggering safety hazards on offshore platforms. Why not?)

Secondly, is when I consider this recently-encountered mindblowing revelation about the psychology of typos, from psychologist Tom Stafford of the University of Sheffield, UK:

“The reason typos get through isn’t because we’re stupid or careless, it’s because what we’re doing is actually VERY SMART.

When you’re writing, you’re trying to convey meaning. It’s a very high-level task.
As with all high-level tasks, your brain generalizes simple, component parts (like turning letters into words and words into sentences) so it can focus on more complex tasks (like combining sentences into complex ideas). We don’t catch every detail, we’re not like computers or NSA databases. Rather, we take in sensory information and combine it with what we expect, and we extract meaning.

When we're reading other peoples' work, this helps us arrive at meaning faster by using less brain power. When we're proofreading our own work, we know the meaning we want to convey. Because we expect that meaning to be there, it's easier for us to miss when parts (or all) of it are absent. The reason we don't see our own typos is because what we see on the screen is competing with the version that exists in our heads.” (End Quote)

Ah okay, I get it… The reason we make typo mistakes is a very relatable, human reason: because we focus on the meaning and overall message, not individual words. The forest, not the trees. The Nasi Kandar mix, not the slightly-too-spicy fish curry. They blend in. The producer/author focuses on the overall package, not the components. I get it.

This certainly helps in my perception to have Husnu-Dzon (good thoughts) for the silly typos in conveying broad ideas. For example, in this case, we can immediately tell that the author intends suspended “load”, because the broad context is the safety hazard of lifting operations, because a little amphibian is unlikely to result in an integrity risk.

(Or is it? 🤔)

Okay, that explains some of it, but still doesn’t quite dismiss the basic criminal offences of wrong dates, names, and contradictions. Sorry, these ones still belong in the bucket of “poor quality attitude”.
We should put in the extra effort to ensure that we produce quality work that we are proud of: not just a “get it over and done with” attitude.
That two second make-or-break impression can undo the great work that we’ve put on for so long: Why not just go a little bit further to do some basic QC?

This isn’t the “extra mile”, this is basic “factory QC”.
Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said,
إِنَّ اللَّهَ كَتَبَ الإِحْسَانَ عَلَى كُلِّ شَىْءٍ
“Verily, Allah has enjoined (that you perform with) excellence (ihsan) in every single thing” (Muslim)

No toads were harmed in the composition of this post.

Seen any good typos lately? What are your thoughts on typos: Bad attitude or hyper-intelligence?

#hazardoustoads #typos #ihsan #TheBarakahEffect

"How do we develop the Love for Qur'an in our children?"

How do we make our children love Allah? Love the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ? The Prophets? The sahabah (radhiAllahu anhum)? The scholars? The Righteous Predecessors?

This is a common question parents ask, and a quest that I myself am constantly struggling to fulfil. 

During some conversation with her fellow mommy friends, my wife was discussing what kind of food they feed their infant children: what they like/dislike, what they should feed. One her friends tried to feed avocado to her infant son – knowing the health benefits – but she complained that despite multiple attempts, he hates it and refuses to eat. 

When my wife told me of this, the first thing I asked her is: “Does the mother herself eat avocado?”

She said, “no. She doesn't like it. ” 

I said, “Exactly.”

So, how do we get our children to love Qur’an?

If we want to instill in our children the Love for anything, WE need to love it first. 

Let the passion and earnest enthusiasm flow through our actions, let it be infectious, allow that curiosity to flourish in them.

There is no secret backdoor. At the risk of sounding like a broken record, it all comes back to the tried and true clichés: Lead by example. Actions speak louder than words. 

You cannot “impose” others to love something, even your own children. Neither can people be forced to love what is alien or unfamiliar. But as parents, you can, out of your actions, lead by example and create an environment that nurtures that love and pave the way for them to organically make that choice. 

Mufti Menk once shared that as a child while growing up, his role models were the imams of Masjidil Haram. He grew up attempting to “imitate” their recitation style and wanting to “be like them when he grew up”. He had never met them, nor did he even know how they looked like. 

In those days, there was no YouTube. They had this thing called “tape cassettes”. His parents created an environment in the home that naturally ‘steered’ his inclination and ambition towards that. He didn’t grow up wanting to be Iron Man or Batman. He grew up wanting to be like the imams of the Haramayn. Look where he is now.

We can observe this in other, non-religious aspects of our lives, too. 

A friend of mine once told me that he that up to today, in his adult years, he can remember the lyrics and the tune to every song by the Beatles – he can even recall the sequence of songs, which side of the cassette they appear in. Even years after not even listening to them. Why? In his years growing up, his parents would put on the same cassette again and again. In long road trips going back to their hometown, being stuck in traffic – repeat the same thing, until eventually it becomes engrained. 

Did their parents ever “tell” him to “love the Beatles”?

No words. Only actions: their passion showed through their constant repetitions. The passion was so infectious, that the children caught on to it, and it left a childhood mark that still has its stain decades later. 

If we want them to love the Qur'an, we must strive to develop that passion in ourselves, first. Let our love for the Qur’an flow through our daily actions – our love in reciting it; in learning to perfect our recitation (tajwid) in it; in our continuous efforts in attending or listening to tafsir classes to develop a better and deeper understanding of it; our earnest efforts in memorizing it; our enthusiasm to revise our memorization. 

Let our actions clearly demonstrate that the Qur’an is not a chore or a burden – rather it’s our genuine passion and something we yearn for. Make it so infectious that they can't ignore it!

After that has been established, then teaching it or sending them off to learn or memorize Qur’an – can become a natural progression of our love. Not a burden or chore. Not a one-off switch that we turn on only in Ramadhan.

The same principle applies for any other aspect of the religion – loving Allah, loving the Prophet ﷺ, loving the sahabah, of seeking knowledge. In fact, we can extend it to love of non-religious good habits – reading, exercise, healthy eating, and so on. 

How have we – through our actions – demonstrated that love, that we want our children to have? How do we spend our free time in a way that nurtures that environment? How often do we even speak about these matters to our children, if it is so important to us?

Consider the following hadith about “friends”, but looked upon from the perspective of parenting and the impact of our influence as parents:

مَثَلُ الْجَلِيسِ الصَّالِحِ وَالْجَلِيسِ السَّوْءِ كَمَثَلِ صَاحِبِ الْمِسْكِ، وَكِيرِ الْحَدَّادِ، لاَ يَعْدَمُكَ مِنْ صَاحِبِ الْمِسْكِ إِمَّا تَشْتَرِيهِ، أَوْ تَجِدُ رِيحَهُ، وَكِيرُ الْحَدَّادِ يُحْرِقُ بَدَنَكَ أَوْ ثَوْبَكَ أَوْ تَجِدُ مِنْهُ رِيحًا خَبِيثَةً

"The example of a good companion in comparison with a bad one, is like that of the perfume seller and the blacksmith's bellows (or furnace); 

From the first (seller of perfume) you would either buy musk or enjoy its good smell (from being in his presence); 

while the blacksmith; he would either burn your clothes or your house, or you get a bad nasty smell from him” (Narrated by Al-Bukhari)

#LoveForQuran #Parenting #LeadByExample #IslamicParenting #LeadByExample 

Cause and Effect of Hidayah (Guidance): A Lesson from Surah Al-Kahf

 

"Still waiting for hidayah, bro", “I have not been guided yet”, “Belum sampai seru”, etcetera.

These are common excuses people give behind to justify why they are not performing obligatory righteous deeds: why they are not praying, not covering up their awrah, or not quitting sinful habits.

Interestingly, many people have a similar approach when it comes to any motivation in general: motivation to workout, to read, to eat healthy, to sign up for that awesome course, or enlist as a volunteer for that amazing cause. They simply wait for something (or someone) to motivate THEM before they take action themselves. As a result, they paralyze themselves into inaction from taking the first step, on the grounds that “I don’t have motivation.”

But that’s not really how motivation works.

“Action leads to motivation, and not the other way around. Any action is better than no action at all. Stop waiting for motivation, and start motivating yourself.” (Dean Bokhari)

Ponder upon the words of Allah surah Al-Kahf ayah #13:

نَحْنُ نَقُصُّ عَلَيْكَ نبَأَهُم بِالْحَقِّ إِنَّهُمْ فِتْيَةٌ ءَامَنُواْ بِرَبِّهِمْ وَزِدْنَـهُمْ هُدًى
“We narrate unto you their story with truth: Truly, they were young men who believed in their Lord (Allah), and We increased them in guidance.”

The young men of the cave took the conscious choice of "iman" (belief) first – and as a result, Allah increased His huda (guidance) for them.

Righteous deeds lead to more guidance. And the more guidance one has, the higher one’s iman, hence more motivation to do more righteous deeds. When done consistently with the correct direction and sincere intent, it becomes a self-reinforcing mechanism that keeps building continuous, ever-growing momentum.

In the tafsir book “Adwaa ul Bayan”, Sheikh Ash-Shanqiti commented on this verse, “What is understood from this noble verse is that whoever believes in his Lord and obeys Him, His Lord will increase his state of guidance, because obedience is a cause for the increase of guidance and faith. This understanding from this noble verse appears clearly in other places [in the Qur’aan]. For example, in the Almighty’s statement:

وَالَّذِينَ اهْتَدَوْاْ زَادَهُمْ هُدًى وَءَاتَـهُمْ تَقُوَاهُمْ
“As for those who accept guidance, He increases their guidance and bestows on them their piety.” (Surah Muhammad, 47: 17)

What this verse tells us is that people have got the cause-and-effect principle of hidayah (guidance from Allah), all wrong. Firstly, Allah’s guidance isn’t random or arbitrary, like a proverbial light from the heavens as we tend to think of.

Secondly, and more importantly: You don’t WAIT for hidayah to come before you perform righteous deeds. It’s the other way around. YOU take the conscious decision to do righteous deeds, and Allah will add to that guidance. Hidayah is bestowed as a gift to positively reinforce your actions.
This is further reinforced in the following ayah:

وَرَبَطْنَا عَلَى قُلُوبِهِمْ إِذْ قَامُواْ فَقَالُواْ رَبُّنَا رَبُّ السَّمَـوَتِ وَالاٌّرْضِ
“And We made their hearts firm and strong when they stood up and said: "Our Lord is the Lord of the heavens and the earth..” (Surah Al-Kahf, 18:14)

Observe the structure of these words of Allah: This ayah tells us then WHEN they stood up and declared their faith to their transgressing mushrik community – an undoubtedly difficult task, considering the risks of negative consequences that may occur as a result – THEN Allah strengthened their hearts to keep their hearts firm.
They don’t “wait” until Allah strengthens their heart to summon the courage to stand up.

Another food for thought: Generally speaking, assuming everything else is constant, who has more guidance – a person who prays his five times a day solah or a person who doesn’t pray at all?
No, it’s not a trick question. (And no, I’m not referring to someone in menses)

The person who prays, makes the following du’aa seventeen times a day, every day in surah Al-Fatihah:
اهْدِنَا الصِّرَاطَ الْمُسْتَقِيمَ
“GUIDE US to the Straight Path”

Think about it this way: the person who prays – i.e. the one who is relatively “more guided” – that person ASKS Allah for guidance much more than the person who doesn’t pray or prays less (who is actually more in need of guidance!)

To rephrase the earlier statement, in light of hidayah:

Action >> hidayah >> more action >> more hidayah >> (infinite loop)

#theBarakahEffect #lessonsFromAlKahf #Hidayah #BelumSampaiSeru #otw

What is the secret behind excellence and being “Best in class”?

 

Is it hard work? Talent? Secret training methods? Cutting edge gadgets and tools?

In his 1989 research paper titled “the Mundanity of Excellence”, Daniel F. Chambliss researched hundreds of swimmers over half a dozen years, studying them to observe what world-class Olympic swimmers do differently from the rest, in an effort to answer the age-old question: "what causes excellence?" 

What differentiates average, from good, from great, from world class? 

The findings are very surprising and debunks a lot of our own biases and assumptions: in a nutshell, the key to achieving excellence isn't anything flashy or exciting - it is in fact, very mundane. 

There is no secret; there is only the doing of all those little things, each one done correctly, time and again, until excellence in every detail becomes a firmly ingrained habit, an ordinary part of one's every day life. 

Quoting a summary of the paper’s conclusion:

"1. Excellence is a QUALITATIVE phenomenon.

Doing more does not equal doing better. High performers focus on qualitative, not quantitative, improvements; it is qualitative improvements which produce significant changes in level of achievement, reflecting vastly different habits, values and goals. 

2. Talent is a useless concept. 

Varying conceptions of natural ability ("talent", "gifted", "good genes") tend to mystify excellence, treating it as the inherent possession of a few; they mask the concrete actions that create outstanding performance. 

3. Excellence is mundane. 

Excellence is accomplished through the doing of actions, ordinary in themselves, performed consistently and carefully, habitualized, compounded together, added up over time. While these actions are "qualitatively different" from those of performers at other levels, these differences are neither unmanageable nor terribly difficult, when examined. For example:

- Mary T. Meagher came to practice on time 

- some writers always work for three hours each morning before beginning anything else

- a businessperson may go ahead and make that tough phone call

- a job applicant writes ONE MORE letter

- a runner decides, against the odds, to enter the race

Every time a decision comes up, the qualitatively "correct" choice will be made. The action, in itself is nothing special; the care and consistency with which it is made is."

The author's friend who read his paper remarked: It is all very mundane and not very exciting. 

To which, the author replied:

"That's the point." (End Quote).

This entire research paper can essentially be summarized by ONE hadith of Prophet Muhammad ﷺ:

سَدِّدُوا وَقَارِبُوا، وَاعْلَمُوا أَنْ لَنْ يُدْخِلَ أَحَدَكُمْ عَمَلُهُ الْجَنَّةَ، وَأَنَّ أَحَبَّ الأَعْمَالِ أَدْوَمُهَا إِلَى اللَّهِ، وَإِنْ قَلَّ 

"Do good deeds correctly, get gradually closer to their perfection (i.e. moderately), and know that your deeds (by themselves) will not cause you to enter Paradise, 

and that the most beloved deeds to Allah are the ones done consistently, even if they are small." (Narrated by Al-Bukhari)

This paper – and this hadith – is empowering because it tells us that we all got what it takes. And we all meet the minimum requirements. 

Consistent, small steps = Big impact. 

But it begs the question: if success was so simple and straightforward, why do so few achieve it? 

Because so few have the stamina and perseverance to push through the mundane. To put in the effort towards continuous improvement in sharpening their qualitative efforts; to trust the process even though there may not be any perceivable, visible results; to hold themselves accountable to commit themselves to the grind, especially when times of boredom, tiredness, and pain start creeping in; to resist the temptation to tread the convenient path to just take it easy.

Just because a solution is “simple”, doesn’t mean it’s easy. But if it’s important enough to us, we will put in the effort. 

We all meet minimum requirements. The question is: How badly do you want it? 

#TheBarakahEffect #TheSlightEdge #PowerofHabit #AtomicHabits

Looking good for our spouses #WorkFromHome

Abdullah ibn Abbas said,

إِنِّي لَأُحِبُّ أَنْ أَتَزَيَّنَ لِلْمَرْأَةِ كَمَا أُحِبُّ أَنْ تَزَيَّنَ لِي لِأَنَّ اللَّهَ عَزَّ وَجَلَّ يَقُولُ
“Verily, I love to beautify myself for my wife, just as I love for her to beautify herself for me, due to the saying of Allah Almighty in the Qur’an:

وَلَهُنَّ مِثْلُ الَّذِي عَلَيْهِنَّ
They have rights similar to those over them.” (Al-Baqarah 2:228)
(Ref: al-Sunan al-Kubrá 14264, Grade: Sahih (authentic) according to Ahmad Shakir)

Abdullah ibn Abbas, the great scholar of tafsir would interpret this verse to mean that rights of the spouse is to look nice for one another.

An important reminder as most of us will be spending lots of time indoors and working from home.

Food for thought: Why not put in the extra effort to groom ourselves for the people who matter the most? Why do we need the excuse of leaving the house, attending a function, a social media post, or going to the office to get us to do that?

Above all else: What is our intention for “looking good”, anyway – especially if we only do that if we leave the home?

Rasulullah, Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said,

أَكْمَلُ الْمُؤْمِنِينَ إِيمَانًا أَحْسَنُهُمْ خُلُقًا وَخِيَارُكُمْ خِيَارُكُمْ لِنِسَائِهِمْ خُلُقًا
“The most perfect of believers are those who are best in their character – and the best of you are those who are best to their wives” (Narrated by Ibn Majah and At-Tirmidzi, who graded it hasan sahih)

#WFH #CoolnessOfOurEyes
#TheBarakahEffect

Birds of a Feather Flock Together: A Lesson from Surah Al-Kahf

 

The first story from the Surah Al-Kahf (in ayat 9 to 25) narrates about a group of young men who chose to disassociate themselves from the idol-worshipping practices of their people. 

But here’s the interesting part: they didn’t know each other. They were not friends prior to that. It was their principles that brought them together.

As ibn Kathir points out in his Tafsir: 

“None of them knew the others, but they were brought together by the One Who instilled faith in their hearts..

When the people went out to attend this gathering, these young men went out with their fathers and their people, and when they saw their people's actions with clear insight, they realized that the prostrations and sacrifices the people were offering to their idols should only be dedicated to Allah, Who created the heavens and the earth. 

Each of them started to withdraw from his people and keep aloof from them. The first one of them to move away on his own went and sat in the shade of a tree, then another came and sat with him, then another came and sat with them, then four more followed suit one by one.” (End quote)

They were brought together and united by a common cause. This is as the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said,

الأَرْوَاحُ جُنُودٌ مُجَنَّدَةٌ فَمَا تَعَارَفَ مِنْهَا ائْتَلَفَ وَمَا تَنَاكَرَ مِنْهَا اخْتَلَفَ

“Souls are like recruited soldiers. Those that recognize one another will come together, 

and those that do not recognize one another will turn away from each other” (Muslim)

Once they found their peer group, they stuck together and sought refuge in the cave where they found strength in each other to adhere to their principles and collaborate in righteousness, free from the oppression of their people. 

An important life lesson for us to actively seek out communities who serve our greater purpose. 

And chuck away those who don't. 

#YouAreTheSumofYourBestFriends #Peers #LessonsFromAlKahf #SurahAlKahf #Friday

#TheBarakahEffect 

You are the Sum of your Best Friends

 

The Terman study followed over a thousand people from youth until death. Here’s what the researchers had to say about whom to hang out with: 

“The groups you associate with often determine the type of person you become. For people who want improved health, association with other healthy people is usually the strongest and most direct path of change.”

In his book, “The Power of Habit”, Charles Duhigg references a 1994 Harvard study of other people who had dramatically changed their lives. Often their secret wasn’t momentous upheaval. It was just joining a group that consisted of the type of people they wanted to become.

So choose these groups wisely. 

(Excerpt from “Barking Up The Wrong Tree: The Surprising Science Behind Why Everything You Know About Success is [Mostly] Wrong” by Eric Baker)

The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said:

الرَّجُلُ عَلَى دِينِ خَلِيلِهِ فَلْيَنْظُرْ أَحَدُكُمْ مَنْ يُخَالِلُ

“A man follows the religion of his close friend; so let everyone be mindful of whom he takes as his close friend.” (Abu Daud, At-Tirmidzi)

مَثَلُ الْجَلِيسِ الصَّالِحِ وَالْجَلِيسِ السَّوْءِ كَمَثَلِ صَاحِبِ الْمِسْكِ، وَكِيرِ الْحَدَّادِ، لاَ يَعْدَمُكَ مِنْ صَاحِبِ الْمِسْكِ إِمَّا تَشْتَرِيهِ، أَوْ تَجِدُ رِيحَهُ، وَكِيرُ الْحَدَّادِ يُحْرِقُ بَدَنَكَ أَوْ ثَوْبَكَ أَوْ تَجِدُ مِنْهُ رِيحًا خَبِيثَةً

"The example of a good companion (who sits with you) in comparison with a bad one, is like that of the seller of perfume and the blacksmith; 

From the first (seller of perfume) you would either buy musk or enjoy its good smell (by simply being in his company); 

while (hanging out with) the blacksmith would either burn your clothes or your house, or you get a bad nasty smell from being in his company." (Narrated by Al-Bukhari)

The "Sorry" habit in online meetings

I don’t get it… Why do we keep saying “sorry” when we unmute our Mic and speak up during online meetings – even if we are positively contributing? It’s not like it’s a crime to speak 🙊

Funny thing is, this “sorry” habit is infectious – when people keep saying this, I find myself also saying “sorry” when I unmute (while being confused at this unnecessary gesture 😂)

Maybe it’s because we feel guilty at interrupting people’s speech. What I find strange, though, is that we don’t even apologize if we speak up in face to face meetings. 

In fact, we’re quite happy to interrupt others in face to face meetings. 

Must be an online thing. Perhaps we feel we are interrupting someone’s podcast 🎤.

Anyone have a better explanation for this bizarre phenomenon?

Abu Mihjan Ath-Thaqafi: The Inspiring Story of the Companion who struggled with alcoholism

Abu Mihjan was one of the companions of the Prophet ﷺ (radhiAllahu anhum), who was suffering from an addiction to drinking wine. He was brought and flogged, then brought and flogged again, but he did not allow this problem to relieve him of his duty to strive for the cause of Islam. 

During the caliphate of Umar, in the Battle of al-Qaadisiyyah against the Persians, Abu Mihjan sought to participate as a soldier, seeking martyrdom (syahadah) on the battlefield. In al-Qaadisiyyah he was brought to the commander of the army, Sa’d ibn Abi Waqqas, for having drunk wine. However, Sa’d detained him so that the Muslims ranks would be purified from the presence of such a person.  

This detention was a harsh punishment which caused Abu Mihjan a great deal of anguish. When he heard the sounds of swords and spears, and the neighing of the horses, and he knew that the fighting had commenced, and the gates of Paradise were open, he was filled with longing for martyrdom.  

He called to the wife of Sa’d ibn Abi Waqqas saying, “Let me go and I promise Allah that if I come back safe and sound, I will put my own feet in the chains, and if I am killed, then you will get rid of me!” 

She felt sorry for him, so she released him to participate in the battle, and he leapt onto a horse belonging to Sa’d which was called al-Balqa’. Then he picked up a spear and set off (covering himself so that he would not be recognized). 

In the battlefield, he did not attack any group of enemy soldier, except that he obliterated them. As the general of the war, Sa’d, who was observing and supervising the battle, was surprised and remarked, “This is the running of al-Balqa’ (my horse), and the style of attack is that of Abu Mihjan, but Abu Mihjan is in chains.”  

When the battle was over, Abu Mihjan went back and put his feet in the chains. The wife of Sa’d told him this wonderful story, so Sa’d admired this man and his care for Islam and his longing for fighting in the cause of Allah, so he himself went to Abu Mihjan, released the chains with his own hands and said, 

“Get up, for by Allah I will never flog you for drinking wine again.” 

Abu Mihjan said, “By Allah, I will never drink it again.” 

(Extracted from IslamQA “The story of Abu Mihjan”: https://islamqa.info/en/answers/26273/the-story-of-abu-mihjan-may-allaah-be-pleased-with-him

See al-Isaabah fi Tamyeez al-Sahaabah, 4/173-174; al-Bidaayah wa’l-Nihaayah, 9/632-633)

Here are ten amazing lessons we can derive from this story

1. Our sins hold us back from realizing our true potential

Abu Mihjan was a beast in battle. This was the talent that Allah blessed him with to add value to the nation. Yet, because of his sinful habit of drinking, he was withheld from allowing his full potential to be unleashed. 

Allah has granted all of us with unique talents, skills, and abilities. We just have to seek it, nurture it, and put it to good use for the sake of Allah. Yet, we must be careful: it could be that, because of our sins – some of which we may consider ‘irrelevant’ – it holds us back from unleashing our true potential. All of that talent and potential could be rendered meaningless due to our stubbornness to repent and change. 

2. Recognizing talent in other (even if they are sinners) 

When Saad bin Abi Waqqas saw this man fight in battle, he immediately recognized that it was Abu Mihjan’s signature fighting style. As the general, Sa’ad knew and recognized the potential in this great man, and he knew that this guy can definitely tip the scales in the favor of his army were he to be present. But he held Abu Mihjan back in chains as a matter of principle, nothing personal. 

Leaders and bosses need to recognize the specific talents of their subordinates and team members, even if they may have ‘other’ traits which may appear to be unfavorable or unlikeable. And at the same time, when it’s a matter of principle, there are lines that you just cannot cross and have to be dealt with accordingly – for example, a person who violated company Codes of Conduct have to be treated accordingly, no matter how much of a “high flyer” that person might be.  

3. Owning up to our shortcomings

Abu Mihjan knew that it was his drinking habit that held him back, and so he made a deal with the wife of Sa’ad, to put him back in chains if he were to return, because he knew he deserved it, and it was nothing personal. 

If we have certain shortcomings in ourselves, especially if we hear of it from constructive criticism, just own up to it, accept the consequences, and try our level best to rectify it. No need to get defensive, get personal, or launch a counter-attack.

The first step to rectifying a problem is to recognize it exists in the first place.

4. Struggles in Kicking the habit: the path to repentance

The Battle of Qadisiyyah happened in the 14th year of Hijrah. This was many years after the prohibition of khamar (alcohol) in Islamic legislation during the time of the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ - and despite all these years knowing it is already Haram, Abu Mihjan still struggles to quit. He was still drinking by the time the Prophet passed away!

Before the coming of Islam, many of the companions of the Prophet ﷺ were themselves involved in alcohol, adultery, gambling, idol worship, and all sorts of other sinful deeds. And many of them, such as Umar, had the strength and conviction in iman to abandon them immediately when they embraced Islam. But for some, such as Abu Mihjan, it was a lot more difficult. But by the end of this battle, he managed to kick the habit. 

The lesson? 

#1: You CAN kick the habit. If you fail and fall back to your old ways, then stand up again. Keep trying. Fail again? No problem. Keep trying. As the Prophet ﷺ said, “Allah will not get tired until you get tired” (Al-Bukhari). 

#2: Every sinner has a future. Every righteous person has a past. 

Don’t be quick to look down upon person who is committing sins or place negative labels on them. Perhaps that individual is struggling to quit and is regretful of his/her actions. Yes, they are still accountable for their sins (such as the case of Abu Mihjan who was still punished, in spite of being recognized for his qualities), but perhaps they can change. We don’t know the outcome of their story yet. As long as they have a pulse, they still have a chance to repent. 

Every one of us has our own shortcomings, and there are no exceptions. The Prophet ﷺ said, “Every son of Adam continuously commits sins – and the best of sinners are those who repent” (ibn Majah).

5. Prevention is Better than Cure: Old Habits Die hard

As we previously mentioned, although many companions were successful at going “cold turkey” to abandon their old sinful habits, some, such as Abu Mihjan, faced a huge struggle to kick the habit: because it has become so ingrained. 

Just like any other sinful acts, such as smoking or pornography, quitting habits is hard. And the longer or deeper you have been involved in a bad habit, the more difficult it is to pull out: especially if it has settled in as an addiction. It might start off as “trying” something, and though it may feel uncomfortable at first, once you start getting that kick, deriving that pleasure from the deed, it becomes a slippery slope of escalation, from habit to addiction. 

Is it possible to quit, if you are deep into addiction? Sure. But it’s very difficult, and so many people fail. 

It is so much easier to refrain from ever starting in the first place, when you never felt the "pleasure" of the dirty deed or bad habits. 

We can also apply this rule in parenting and raising children, on how we limit what they are exposed to, especially in our screens. Control what you expose them to, particularly those which can potentially develop an unhealthy habit or addiction. Don’t give them a harder time to quit when they grow up!

6. Eagerness towards Righteous deeds

Despite struggling with alcoholism and being publicly known for that, Abu Mihjan did not feel shame, humiliated, depressed or sorry for himself. Where there was an opportunity to do righteous deeds, he rose to the occasion, and didn’t allow this public perception to deter him from righteous deeds. 

When we are guilty of sinning, shaitan plants seeds of despair and hopelessness to prevent us from doing good deeds, in the form of self-condemnation, so that our low self-esteem will paralyze us from taking action. 

“Oh bro, you’re such a terrible person for your sins, and now you want to give da’wah? You’re such a hypocrite!”

Don’t give in to his tricks! As mentioned earlier, every single one of us – even the best among us – are guilty of committing sins, some of which is only Known to Allah. Don’t let that hold us back from other good deeds! 

7. Honoring Commitments

One thing that stood out for me in the story was, when Abu Mihjan returned, he actually chained himself back, as per his commitment to the wife of Sa’ad who released him. 

He fought so courageously that he contributed to the victory of the army. He didn’t just “let himself get martyred”, if you know what I mean. He gave it 100%.

Despite his heroic exploits, he didn’t return home as a pompous champion or the “man of the match”. He went back and chained himself, staying true to his word. 

Lesson: Don’t get blinded by our achievements. Honour the commitments or the debts that we have made (e.g. Student loans)

8. What triggers change?

Despite the firm legislation of alcohol being haram, suffering the consequences of flogging and chaining, Abu Mihjan still couldn’t quit. Finally, when he went to the battlefield, was victorious, and returned, it was the remarks from Saad: “I will never flog you again”, that finally led to Abu Mihjan declaring, “I will never drink again”. 

When we want to help people to change – or kick their bad habits – perhaps our approach in the past has not been effective. Yet. Keep trying, and vary your methods and approach in accordance to your wisdom. You never know which one sticks. 

“If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you always got”

9. Role of the wife: the people behind the scenes

And who was responsible to trigger this sequence of events? The wife of Sa’ad. 

Let that thought sink in. 

This one goes for the wives, mothers, fathers, teachers, mentors, good companions, and all of the great people behind the scenes who played a part to shape who we are: your contributions matter. The people may not recognize your contributions, or even know your names, but Allah knows. And Allah will reward them full-time, even if they are not physically in the proverbial battlefield. 

The Prophet ﷺ said, "He who prepares a mujahid (fighter) for struggle/war in the Path of Allah, has in fact fought (i.e. is entitled to the same reward as the fighter)” (Al-Bukhari).

10. Power of repentance

For a huge portion of his life, Abu Mihjan was struggling with alcoholism. But because he repented, his life isn’t defined by that. 

Now, 1400 years later as we his story, it was not the story of “Abu Mihjan the alcoholic”, the narrative is of “Abu Mihjan, the Hero of the battle of Qadisiyyah, and the hero of his battle against alcohol”

Food for thought. So, what is the narrative that defines your life?

“Copy Paste Doa” vs “Berdoa”

Bila kita lihat orang berkongsi khabar berita di WhatsApp atau media sosial tentang kejadian yang disunnahkan untuk kita berdoa – seperti pengumuman orang meninggal, baru kahwin, atau baru dapat cahaya mata – pastikan kita benar-benar BERDOA kepada Allah secara lisan. 

Yang penting adalah kita ikhlas mohon kepada Allah, bukan sekadar copy paste atau tampal sticker semata-mata untuk memperlihatkan yang diri kita prihatin.  

Bahkan kalau nak ikutkan, kalau kita berdoa terus kepada Allah dengan sembunyi tanpa copy paste pun lagi bagus sebenarnya. Dari sudut praktikal, dalam group WhatsApp, kadangkala mesej asal dah tenggelam bila terlalu ramai copy paste. Sedar-sedar, tengok group wasap, kita pun heran… apahal semua dok “inna lillah” ni.. siapa yang meninggal sebenarnya? Bayangkan orang baru pulang setelah musafir atau balik dari offshore… beratus-ratus mesej nak baca.. habis tenggelam, matlamat tak tercapai. 

Dari sudut agama pula, berdoa secara sembunyi pula lebih baik kerana Nabi ﷺ bersabda: 

دَعْوَةُ الْمَرْءِ الْمُسْلِمِ لأَخِيهِ بِظَهْرِ الْغَيْبِ مُسْتَجَابَةٌ، عِنْدَ رَأْسِهِ مَلَكٌ مُوَكَّلٌ كُلَّمَا دَعَا لأَخِيهِ بِخَيْرٍ، قَالَ الْمَلَكُ الْمُوَكَّلُ بِهِ: آمِينَ وَلَكَ بِمِثْلٍ

“Doa seseorang muslim untuk saudaranya secara sembunyi (tanpa pengetahuannya) adalah mustajab. 

Di kepalanya (yang berdoa) terdapat malaikat yang diwakilkan kepadanya, setiap kali dia berdoa kepada saudaranya dengan kebaikan maka malaikat yang diwakilkan itu akan berkata: 

“Amin, dan bagi engkau seperti itu juga (sama seperti apa yang didoakan itu)”. (HR Muslim)

Imam An-Nawawi menulis dalam kitabnya, Al-Azkar, hal.16 :

ﺍﻋﻠﻢ ﺃﻥ ﺍﻷﺫﻛﺎﺭ ﺍﻟﻤﺸﺮﻭﻋﺔ ﻓﻲ ﺍﻟﺼﻼﺓ ﻭﻏﻴﺮﻫﺎ ﻭﺍﺟﺒﺔً ﻛﺎﻧﺖ ﺃﻭ ﻣﺴﺘﺤﺒﺔً ﻻ ﻳُﺤﺴﺐُ ﺷﻲﺀٌ ﻣﻨﻬﺎ ﻭﻻ ﻳُﻌﺘﺪّ ﺑﻪ ﺣﺘﻰ ﻳﺘﻠﻔَّﻆَ ﺑﻪ ﺑﺤﻴﺚُ ﻳُﺴﻤﻊ ﻧﻔﺴﻪ ﺇﺫﺍ ﻛﺎﻥ ﺻﺤﻴﺢ ﺍﻟﺴﻤﻊ ﻻ ﻋﺎﺭﺽ ﻟﻪ 

“Ketahuilah bahawa zikir yang disyariatkan dalam solat dan selainnya, baik yang wajib ataupun sunnah, TIDAK DIHITUNG dan tidak dikira, 

kecuali ianya diucapkan/dilafazkan dengan lisan sehingga ia dapat mendengar yang diucapkannya sendiri apabila pendengarannya sihat dan dalam keadaan normal (yakni, bukan dalam keadaan bising)”.

The Performance Appraisal writeup dilemma: As a Muslim, how do we balance between “showcasing our contributions” versus “showing off” (riyaa/kibr)?

 

A recent discussion that was triggered between a few group of friends: when it comes to year end performance: 

How do we do our writeups in such a way that we can clearly highlight our contributions, without coming off as self-centered, arrogant or just plain “showing off”? Where do we draw the line between humility and giving justice to our efforts?

There is a time and place for everything. As Muslims, it is in the DNA of our religion to be humble. Among many authentic hadith regarding this, one of them is one in which the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

إنَّ لِكُلِّ دينٍ خُلُقًا، وخُلُقُ الإسلامِ الحياءُ

“Verily, in every religion, there is a (primary) characteristic: and the characteristic of Islam is that of modesty/humility” (Narrated by Ibn Majah, Muwatta Malik)

And by default, this should be our demeanor. However, there are some contexts, where it is a necessity or a greater benefit to mention our qualities, such as employment and performance reviews. 

Consider the case of Prophet Yusuf (Joseph) alayhissalam, when he offered himself to the King be appointed as the Minister (Al-Aziz) when he said:

قَالَ اجْعَلْنِي عَلَىٰ خَزَائِنِ الْأَرْضِ ۖ إِنِّي حَفِيظٌ عَلِيمٌ

"Appoint me me over the storehouses of the land; Indeed, I am a knowledgeable guardian". (Surah Yusuf, 12:55)

In his request, Yusuf clearly mentioned his qualities to the king – hafidz (guardian), aleem (knowledgeable, competent for the job). Was Yusuf bragging or boasting?

As we know from the story of Yusuf, he was among the most humble and modest of people. But in this circumstance, he knew, from the King’s dream that there was impending crisis (a seven-year drought), and Egypt could end up in some dire consequences if its resources were managed in wrong hands. Since he knew he had what it takes, he showed the ownership to step up and offer himself to resolve the problem.

If he remained “humble” about his qualities/qualifications, the King may not recognize why Yusuf was worthy to handle such a job! It was a necessity to highlight his credentials to demonstrate that he was up to the task.

Think about it this way: can you imagine the value of a “humble” CV / resume? How attractive is that? Imagine, going on Linked In and stumbling across someone’s CV that says Educational Qualifications & work experience = “Nothing much lahh”.

So now, answering the question at hand. When it comes to performance reviews, we SHOULD highlight our contributions to our superior. In fact, don’t pull your punches or hold back!

 

One of the ways we can rethink this paradigm is to see it from the perspective of the employer/ your superiors: 

1. Imagine them asking this question: What did you do to earn that paycheck? Why should we keep you, if there are better people out there, especially under these tough conditions? What benefit does the organization gain with your presence?

2. They may not be aware of your contributions and what value you are adding. They have other subordinates – your colleagues – to evaluate, and as human beings we have limitations. They need your help to surface out what you have done. 

3. If you don’t highlight your contributions well, the organization might accidentally “reward” the ones who are not deserving of good performance ratings, which is also a form of injustice/oppression. Consider the bell curve distribution: the organization/department/team has a quota on the number of high/average/low performers. When the actual high performers go lower, the non-performers go up! Highlighting your contributions is, in fact, fulfilling your part of the equation when it comes to justice (al-adl) to ensure that everyone’s performance is objectively evaluated. 

But of course, it must be done within mindful limits: We still practice being “humble” in a sense that we do not do our performance writeup with arrogance, such as looking down on other colleagues, or in denying their contributions or collaborative efforts with us. Keep it honest, transparent and straight, without exaggerating, with clear justifications to back your claims. 

It is also worth reminding ourselves that we shouldn’t do a half-hearted submission just because “we won’t get bonus anyway”, due to our business’ financial performance this year due to COVID-19. Performance appraisal isn’t just about our personal compensation. On an organizational scale, it is about managing and optimizing its most important resources: its people. And at an individual capacity, it is about fulfilling our responsibilities with justice and excellence (adl and ihsaan), because that is our amanah with Allah. 

And when we’ve done our best, put our trust in Allah, knowing that whatever the outcome is for the best. 

  فَإِذَا عَزَمْتَ فَتَوَكَّلْ عَلَى اللَّـهِ ۚ إِنَّ اللَّـهَ يُحِبُّ الْمُتَوَكِّلِينَ  

Then when you have taken a decision, put your trust in Allah, certainly, Allah loves those who put their trust (in Him). (Ali Imran 3:159)

All the best, everyone! BarakAllahu fikum